your arms full of lullabies, orchids and wine
by Sixteen clumsy and shy
Summary: Song-Fic Drabbles. Random drabbles that come from many different songs mostly Decemberists and Morrissey. Rated for yaoi and/or coarse language First Chapt: "The Tain parts I, II, III, IV, V Second Chapt: "On the Bus Mall" Updated whenever
1. The Tain prts I,II,III,IV,V

_damn your ankles and eyes wide from you fingernails to your ponytails too. king of the insects and the m-5 over Charlemagne in a motorcade too. and baby needs a new prize baby needs a new and shiny prize. in this place called heavenly you were born here. this place called heavenly you were born here. you were born here. and now all the marchers descend from high I will dedicate all of my awakenings to this. and damn all the angles that oppress my sight I will bleed your heart through a samovar soon. _

_in this place called heavenly you were born here. this place called heavenly you were born here. you were born here. _

The television screens, grey and fuzzy depicted a portrait of absolute sin. He watched as his _beloved_ moaned the name of _another_. Their sexual act infuriated him, and his fingers (so like the person's who was clinging to a _child_) clenched around the half-empty glass jar.

His red eyes zoomed around the screen's face, watching as they engaged in acts that only _he_ was allowed to do to his beloved. The jar began to crack under the heavy pressure his red-stained fingers were applying. A grape coated tongue darted out of his mouth to lick away the imaginary sweetness.

His red eyes widened to an almost unimaginable degree as he watched his beloved come; it was almost as if his beloved, _his toy_ were laughing and taunting as he panted.

The jar finally shattered in his constricting fingers, nicking and cutting his already red-stained fingers. He lifted them two inches away from his red eyes to examine as the red life giving liquid seeped out from under his white skin. His tongue flicked out to wet his parched lips once again.

Two dark brown eyes gaped up at the man as he stood roughly from the desk. His chair bumped up against the body of the surveillance guard as he turned to walk toward the closet where the other was being kept.

His stained fingers wrenched open the flimsy door; the other guard stared up at him with teary blue eyes. B smirked as he flicked open a stained red pocket knife. His red eyes met the other man's.

"Nothing personal." He gave a cheery laugh as he drove the small knife into the man's wide eye.

L would pay for his infidelity, he was _B's_ after all.

_here upon this pillow made of reed and willow you're a fickle little twister are you sweet on your sister? your fallow won't leave you alone. and granted for their pleasure possessions laid to measure she's a salty little pisser with your cock in her kisser but now she's a will of her own_

-

-**Finis**

_This is just something that I did to get my 'creative juices' flowing. I've noticed how much I LOVE "The Tain (Parts I, II, III, IV,V). It's an amazing 18-minute song, and I fully suggest that you download it now! _

_Also, I hope I (there's a slim chance of this) made B as in character as possible. I haven't read "Death Note: Another Note" but I hope to! _

_And Like always, please review for this starving review whore! _


	2. On The Bus Mall

_And here in the alleys  
Your spirits will rally  
As you learn quick to make a fast buck  
In bathrooms and barrooms  
On dumpsters and heirlooms  
We bit our tongues  
Sucked our lips into our lungs  
Because we were falling  
Such was our calling  
_

--

And you were the most naïve of us all.

When we had first met, I only thought of one thing, and that was to warn you. I didn't want you to end up like myself; I didn't want this type of life to taint you.

I didn't want it, but no matter how many times I told you this, you ignored me with a delicate shrug of a shoulder.

I watched as it slowly ate you, and made you emotionless. I watched as you scrounged around for the drugs you whored yourself to get. For the first time in three years, I cried; I cried for your mother, and your father whom I'm sure missed you terribly.

And…maybe I cried for myself, however selfish that may have sounded. I cried for the many nights I could have told you to 'do this' or 'do that', but I didn't and now you're somewhere with someone.

Your drawers were full of rumpled clothing, and crumbled dollar-bills and used needles. I sighed and placed the money back.

I heard you banging on the door to let me know that you wanted in. I took in your appearance nonchalantly, though the way you presented yourself was quite shocking. Your hair in disarray, and your clothing torn and muddy.

"What happened?" I asked softly, placing a cool finger-tip on a purplish bruise that was forming under your left eye. You winced slightly, but welcomed the contact.

You bit your lip. "I was assaulted; there were too many for me to handle, so I fled."

I placed my right hand flat against your chest. "This isn't good; even two men would be too hard to handle when you're sick." I can feel your fever underneath the wool shirt you wore. You grabbed my hand and jerked it away from your body.

"I'll be fine," You turned and stalked toward the bathroom. "All I need is a shower…"

The door slammed shut, and I sighed. Sitting down on the bed, I held my head in my hands and a few tears leaked out of my eyes. Using again? Most likely.

However, tomorrow was Sunday…

--

_And oh, what a bargain,  
We're two easy targets  
For the old men at the off-tracks,  
Who've paid in palaver  
And crumpled old dollars,  
Which we squirreled away  
In our rat trap hotel by the freeway.  
And we slept-in Sundays.  
_

-**Finis**

_Well, I think I'm going to continue "Your Arms Full of Lullabies, Orchids and Wine" (long title) and make them sort-a drabbles. _

_This one is inspired by the Decemberists song "On the Bus Mall" which made me cry the first time I heard it…It's a great song!_

_As always, please review. OH! I'll try to update "We Both Go Down Together" soon; we're (finally!) going on the Sioux City trip Tuesday, so I'll try to write then!_


	3. I know very well how I got my name

_A child in a curious phase  
A A child in a curious phase  
A man with sullen ways  
Oh, I know very well how I got my name_

You think you were my first love  
You think you were my first love, but you're wrong  
You were the only one  
Who's come and gone

When thirteen years old  
Who dyed his hair gold?  
Oh, I know very well, I don't need to be told

You think you were my first love  
You think you were my first love, but you're wrong  
You were the only one  
Who's come and gone

You were the only one  
Who's come and goneman with sullen ways  
Oh, I know very well how I got my name

You think you were my first love  
You think you were my first love, but you're wrong  
You were the only one  
Who's come and gone

When thirteen years old  
Who dyed his hair gold?  
Oh, I know very well, I don't need to be told

You think you were my first love  
You think you were my first love, but you're wrong  
You were the only one  
Who's come and gone

You were the only one  
Who's come and gone

--

The little boy stared at the house as it was consumed by flame. His tiny hands tightened around the ashy blue pajama pants as snow fell about him.

People had began to gather around the burning house, and they watched as the consuming flames where doused.

The boy's large owlish eyes were like mirrors as they reflected the men in their large rubber coats console him, their large hands patted him on the back. No one would be able to comfort him like they were trying to…

"L?" The boy felt a warm hand clasp around his cold one. He turned his pit-like eyes to one of the neighbor boys. The boy was thirteen years old, two years older than himself, but because of their intelligence they had become something of friends.

The boy called L closed his owlish eyes over tears that threatened to be shed, and squeezed the boy's hand. He didn't have to say anything because he knew Light would be there.

"Light…I'm tired." He whispered as two burly firemen escorted them to the ambulance. With a slight girlish blush L noted that Light still hadn't let go of his hand. The snow was dropping more heavily over head, and L decided that he didn't like the snow.

A woman doctor hoisted L up into the back of the open ambulance, handing him and Light two cups of warm coco. L's black eyes darted over to the smoldering ruins of his youth's house, and saw two body bags being drug out of the debris.

L glanced back down to the cooling chocolate and saw his pale face reflected there. Light shifted next to him, and he saw the boy's gold eyes glance quickly.

On the night when the boy L Lawliet lost his parents, he and his first childhood love shared a kiss in the back of an ambulance, and the morning after L was taken away in a yellow taxi never to see Light again.

-

-**Finis**

_I swear…my teenaged angst is getting to me. D: _

_This ISN'T a Decemberists song, but it's a Morrissey song called "I Know Very Well How I Got My Name". It's a beautiful song :D _

_Remember, please review; also, tell me if this chapter sounds forced, I kinda think it does…_


	4. Pregnant for the Last Time

_Phlegm lapels for the last time  
Corn beef legs for the last time  
Oh, we're so glad  
That you've finally decided_

But then you see someone new  
And you want someone new  
So you have someone new  
I don't blame you  
We would all do the same as you  
If ever we had the nerve to

Chips with cream for the last time  
The People's Friend for the last time  
Oh, we're so glad  
That you've finally decided

Tiny striped socks for the last time  
Pokes and prods for the last time  
And the doctor said  
"Don't nod your head until June !"

But then you see someone new  
And you want someone new  
So you have someone new  
I don't blame you  
We would all do the same as you  
If ever we had the chance to

Sick at noon for the last time  
And who is going to clean up ?  
Would you be so kind ?  
Oh, everybody's staring  
At the strange clothes that you're wearing

Bad advice for the last time  
And people being nice for the very first time  
Oh, we're so glad  


--

"I have to _pee_ on it!?"

Several people turned to look at him as he stared at the small box, mouth agape. A older lady with pink curlers in her silver hair stared at him.

L mentally sighed and blew a strand of black hair away from his face; her eyes moved from the 'pee stick' (as he so _lovingly _called it), to his flushed face. L stared at her, letting his lips slowly curl into a smile that he liked to call: "The smile of extreme discomfort!"

The woman lowered her eyes quickly, and shuffled towards the magazines. _Pfft, typical._

L sighed again as he placed three boxes (he wanted to be _sure_) of the stupid pregnancy tests on the Walgreens counter; the emo make-up of the cashier girl was beginning to smear.

She gave the detective a shy smile and placed his 'purchases' into the customary plastic bag. Her joyful red smock shined brightly despite the late hour, and her name tag read (screamed, rather) 'Hi! I'm Sakura!'

"I hope you and your girlfriend are happy with the baby." L turned and gave her a look that read: _Are you and IDIOT?!_

"These are for myself."

--

No. No. NO!

L stared, eyes wide, at the pee stick; his mouth had slacked, and his eyes had widened to beyond their normal 'wideness'.

Howcould this have happened!? He was a man, for god's sake! But…how many had it been? Tests later, all had the overly cheery _pink_ plus sign.

L was sure that it was this sign of the devil. The apocalypse.

For L anyway.

God dammit.

_-_

_-_

_I swore to myself that I would NEVER write M-preg, but…here we go! _

_This song is another Morrissey song called "Pregnant for the last time', a funny song. _

_Today is my eldest sister's birthday (Kitsune-bot), she'll be twenty-one; also my friend Sarah's birthday was last week, so this chapter is dedicated to both of them! Lot's of Love! _

_Please review._


	5. The Landlord's Daughter

_As I was a-ramble  
Down by the water  
I spied in sable  
The landlord's daughter  
I produced my pistol, then my saber  
Said, "Make no whistle or thou will be murdered!"_

She cursed, she shivered  
She cried for mercy  
"My gold and silver if thou will release me!"

"I'll take no gold, miss, I'll take no silver  
But I'll take those sweet lips, and thou will deliver!"

--

I hiss in anger; my lip is slightly ripped and a trickle of warm blood slides slowly over my pale skin. A small smirk of triumph curls the edges of your red lips.

"D-don't do this." I hiss, or try to at least. My voice catches slightly.

You laugh, a purely evil tone, and place your hands on either side of my head, pinning me in place. "Don't be so pathetic, Near." You purr, your dark amber eyes narrow. You take a finger and smear the warm blood across my puckering lower lip. "Who did that?" Your voice is now light, almost airy as you ask this.

The task force room is dark, the only light coming from the faintly buzzing monitors in the background.

I feel your erection stiff against the top of my leg, and I mentally cringe at the size. _I don't want this!_ I scream inside my head.

Your fingers have found the top three buttons to my pajama shirt, and you rip them open. I close my eyes over slick tears as you plant harsh kisses over my exposed flesh. I try to fight back; I thrash around, screaming for you to stop. I hope for someone, _anyone_ to find you on top of me; I just want this hell to end!

You drag your lips roughly over mine, biting down hard and drawing blood.

I fist a hand and try to punch you off; a tear snakes its way out of my clenched eyes.

You strip me, and I'm left naked for your hungry gaze. You strip and push me once more against the wall. Deft fingers grap and touch any part of my white flesh, and I hear you laugh again.

"Don't!" I cry, "Raito, please DON'T!" Now I feel my resolve cracking, and I hear the desperation in my pleas.

Two, three fingers scissor my virginal opening, and I thrash even more, sobs choking me.

I'm dropped carelessly to the ground, and once again you're on top of me. Burning heat courses through my lower back as you thrust into me; in, out, in, out…

I become like a doll, and let the tears fall freely, gripping the carpet as some sort of lifeline. Your thrusts become quicker, and only once did you hit anything that made me feel any sort of pleasure.

You climax, and your cum fills me. You rest heavily on me for a few seconds before pulling out, you dick limp again.

I curl into a sniveling ball as you dress, and notice a small ghost of a smile pass over your lips.

You press your forefinger to your mouth in order to tell me that if I told anyone of this, I'd die.

Don't worry Kira, you'll die soon enough.

-

-**Finis**

_Two updates in one day. I'm proud of myself. _

_Yeah, dark side Light X Near. Song is from "The Island (Come and see); __**The Landlord's daughter**__; You'll not feel the drowning". I like this song a lot, and fully suggest that you download it. _

_Please review. _


	6. Jack the Ripper

_Oh you look so tired;_

_Mouth slackened wide. _

_Ill housed and ill advised _

_Your face is as mean as your life has been._

_Crash into my arms, I WANT YOU._

_You don't agree, but you don't refuse._

_I know you…_

_And I know a place, where no one is likely to pass._

_And you don't care if you're late, and you don't care if you're lost._

_But oh you look so tired. But tonight you presume too much._

_And if it's the last thing I ever do I'M GONNA GET YOU._

_Crash into my arms, I WANT YOU._

_You don't agree, but you don't refuse._

_I KNOW YOU._

_And no one knows a thing about me, I can come and go as I please…_

_Crash into my arms, I WANT YOU. _

_You don't agree, but you don't refuse…I know you…_

_Crash into my arms…I WANT YOU! _

_You don't agree, but you don't refuse…I know you…_

_--_

"_**I'm sad."**_

_**Rain was falling over the train yard in cool waves. A small boy sat huddled in an immobile caboose; his raven hair stuck to the sides of his narrow, white face. Wide, black eyes watched as the two men disposed of their latest kill. They knew he was watching, but they didn't bother him. Not yet. **_

_**The small boy stood, uncurling from his hunched crouch. Long white fingers unfurled from their clenched positions with a crack. His swollen stomach didn't growl anymore, and the dizzying head-aches were fading as well. **_

_**Usually he would find a meager helping of wilted vegetables in the rubbish bins, but today he had a different plan. **_

_**He turned to the corpse…**_

--

L awoke with a shivering start. His black eyes had shot open in fear, and he clawed at the sheets as a life-line. His breath was caught in his throat; the dull ebbing of a faint head-ache was fading in the back of his head.

_What…was that?_ L thought breathlessly; his knuckles were beginning to turn even paler from the constricting grip he had on the royal blue sheets. Slowly he let go, hearing the appendages crack lightly. He shivered, remembering the nightmare.

It had felt so real, almost too real for it to be a dream.

The detective sat up on the bed, running a long fingered hand through his tangled and sweaty hair.

He jumped out of the hot bed, and found himself retching into the toilet's porcelain bowl. His eyes bugged slightly as another wave of nausea washed over him.

Ever since his parents had died, he had been having the same dream over and over. I would always start off with a child's voice softly saying, "I'm sad." That's why he barely slept at all. His fatigue would be masked with his constant sugar intake, and the insane drive to complete a case.

L rested his head against the bathroom's tiled floor, a small whimper escaped his dry throat.

Watari knew nothing of his reoccurring nightmares, and L never planned to tell his old mentor.

There was a crack of thunder, and soon the power went out. When living in Wammy's for the first (and only) years of his schooling, L found out that he had a phobia of the dark. Even though he _worked_ mostly in the dark, there was always something like a computer screen buzzing through out the night. But now he was covered in darkness with no light source what so ever.

The twenty-four year old curled up in a sniveling ball, breath coming out in short hyperventilating pants.

He refused to cry. He wouldn't…

There was a brief flash of lightening, and the small bathroom was doused in a tease of light.

"What's wrong, Lawli?" A dark crooning voice purred beside his ear. L's eyes snapped open.

No…

He could feel _someone's_ hot breath fan over his cool ear. "Afraid of a little dark?" He felt spidery hands --too much like his own--wrap around his girlish wrists, pulling him off the floor.

Nothing, he could see absolutely nothing. He was blind!

"I'm sad to see the great detective L fall to the level of a sniveling child because the lights aren't on." His captor's grin glinted even in the dark. L knew who this was.

"B…" He breathed shakily, and felt the other's heart beat increase. No…B was dead! How then…?

"That's right, Lawli," Be smirked (L could tell because of the change in his voice.) "You look so tired…have you been sleeping well?"

Crazy…he's crazy!

"L-let go of me." L could feel B's spidery finger tips; calloused. Burnt. He could feel B lifting one his own hands to the other's face, and made his fingers apply pressure on the burnt skin.

"Do you feel this Lawli?" B breathed, as if in awe. "I did this because I love you…"

_N-no…_L held back bile that began to rise in his throat. The grip on his hand tightened so that there was a sickening crunch. L whimpered softly.

"You know that _you_ are _mine; _I've loved you for so long, and you sleep with another." B sighed and clicked his tongue. "You'll have to be punished, darling."

At that moment, the power of the hotel came back on. L stared, wide eyed into his own pit-like eyes. The glossy mirror reviled his too pale face with his spidery fingers lightly touching his own cheek.

-

- **Finis**

_--phew-- I wrote this during my lunch period while listening to "Jack the Ripper" by MORIESSY not Good Charlotte. In my opinion they butchered the song, but hey…that's my opinion. --shrug--_

_Please review!_


	7. You'll Not Feel the Drowning

_I will dress your eyelids  
With dimes upon your eyes  
Laying close to water  
Green your grave will rise  
Go to sleep, little ugly  
Go to sleep, you little fool  
Forty-winking in the belfry  
You'll not feel the drowning  
You'll not feel the drowning_

Forget you once had sweethearts  
They've forgotten you  
Think you not on parents  
They've forgotten too  
Go to sleep now, little ugly  
Go to sleep now, you little fool  
Forty-winking in the belfry  
You'll not feel the drowning  
You'll not feel the drowning

Go to sleep, little ugly  
Go to sleep, little fool  
Forty-winking in the belfry  
You'll not feel the drowning  
You'll not feel the drowning

Hear you now the captain  
Heed his sorrowed cry  
Weight upon your eyelids  
Is dimes laid on your eyes

_-_

Near gripped the plastic doll, causing the small doll labeled 'Kira' to crack. Halle turned away from the buzzing computers to glance the short nineteen year old.

"Near?" She asked softly so the other members working on the case wouldn't hear.

He threw the marked doll to the floor and stood quickly. "I can't stay in here any longer." He muttered in a hastily whispered monotone, and shuffled quickly out of the dark task force room.

-

_Bip, bip, bip._ A gothic scrip 'N' flashed on the screen. Light let a smirk form slowly on his lips, almost making him seem predatory.

"_**L.**_" The synthetic monotone voice buzzed from the speakers.

"Yes, _N_?"

-

Near flinched slightly at the cool smugness that Yagami Light held in his voice. It reminded him to much of _it._

_No. Stop thinking about that._ Near scolded himself, _It happened, and it's done._

He glanced at Halle; her mouth was pursed in a fine line. She watched him intently.

-

"_**I would like to meet you in person…face to face." **_There was a brief pause to allow static electricity to bubble from the computer speakers.

The idiot members around him gasped loudly; in his head, Light was laughing.

They set up the time, place and date for their meeting. Light felt like all the pieces of the puzzles were fitting soundly together.

**January 19, 2013 **

When Light saw that Near worn and L mask, he only felt anger. It was a silent barb at his feelings toward the dead detective, Light just knew that. _How dare he…_Light wanted to snap Near's neck himself.

-

Gun shots; a spray of crimson. Defeat.

As Light ran, he glanced back toward the accursed nineteen year old. He watched as a feline smirk spread across Near's pale lips; he watched as the boy lifted his white forefinger to press against his lips.

_I won._

-

-**Finis**

_Soo, I went around and made a part two of "The Tain" (which is "Jack the Ripper" as you probably could tell.) And here is the 'sequel' to "The Land Lord's Daughter." _

_This was fun to write; the last paragraph I had to change some-what because it sounded a bit too choppy. _

_I hope you like it, and remember: __**Review!!**_


	8. Written in Blood

_Blood red lips traced with a tongue they shine,  
Cut theought a crowded room.  
A look can say a lot sometimes  
And so I take all my past attractions  
And project on you.  
Every dissapointment and mistake,  
Some resintment from a one-night heartbreak.  
My head is spinning  
My hands go damp,  
But still I force an introduction  
And I ask you to dance.  
You feel like home up aginst me so close,  
Though we've just met tonight .  
There's still so much that we still don't know,  
But I'm fairly certain  
That we just might work out right.  
Then again it can all go up in flames,  
And I'll take you down in the name of love.  
But for now let's kiss hard,  
Fuck the games.  
All or nothing, it's written in blood__  
On the way to the wedding,  
Dressed in black, she said  
"Sorry lover but you can't look back."  
She says  
"Oh no," she goes,  
"Oh no," she goes  
"Slow down baby or you're gonna explode."  
On the way to the wedding,  
Dressed in black, he said  
"Sorry lover but you can't look back."  
She says  
"Oh no," she goes,  
"Oh no," she goes  
"Slow down baby keep your eyes on the road"_

_--_

It was taboo the way their bodies met; it was as if they were cut out of the same cloth. B chuckled in his head, his red eyes half lidded as he felt tremors of pleasure run down his body. In a way, maybe they were.

The sheets were strewn across the almost empty room that contained only a computer and a messy bed. The bed creaked with every thrust B made; since they were in a deserted level of Wammy's, no one would hear them during their acts of clumsy taboo 'passion'.

He felt L's fingernails claw at his back, and he felt new crescent shaped scars start to bleed slowly. B bit down hard on the other male's pale, swan-like neck, leaving another 'love-bite'. He lapped at the crimson blood that bubbled from the shallow wound.

The air was perfumed by their heady sex scent; it made B laugh loudly when he knew L was resting. It amused him greatly to know that he had seen the seemly emotionless detective when the man was most venerable.

"Mm…ah…_R-Raito…_" His red eyes widened, and he felt he insides coil at the name.

A loud sharp slap echoed through the almost empty room.

L's eyes widened in semi-horror as he body was forcefully pinned to the mattress by his 'twin's' rough hands.

Sharp, angry thrusts made the bed creak loudly, and made the head-board bang loudly against the wall. B's hot tongue plunged into L's needy mouth, and they kissed roughly. B bit at the detective's lips, causing blood to smear on his chin, and over the murder's slightly flushed cheeks.

It was a steady rhythm; sharp thrusts met the wet, and almost needy opening of the detective. The murder's teeth pulled at L's skin, and made angry red blotches form over the areas where he nipped at.

Two, three times he caused L to actually see his pleasure, and pushed the man over the edge.

A low moan escaped L's mouth as sticky white come spurted in between his legs.

B felt his climax, and soon he bit down at the detective's neck, muffling his loud moan of release.

They collapsed, and B could feel L's heart fluttering quickly against his chest. No lights were turned on; they didn't need to see the other to know that this was all so totally _wrong_.

So clumsy and taboo the way their bodies met…

-

_Soft wet skin, hairs raised, body tired;  
And the sheets are across the floor.  
You tell me that love don't last,  
Drawing circles with your fingernails across my back.  
As your lips form the words you won't say,  
In the distance your favorite song plays.  
I turn you over and look in your eyes,  
Promise you that this is forever  
Or till one of us dies.  
You taste like tear stains  
And could have beens,  
But I love a good train wreck.  
Your hair balled up inside my fist,  
You tell me don't get too attatched  
Like this is just entertainment.  
Then again it could go up in flames,  
And I'll take you down in the name of love.  
Maybe one last kiss just to ease the pain  
All or nothing it's written in blood_

-

-

_B has…taken over my mind. And he…he forced me to write this. --hides--_

_She wants Revenge is SUCH a BxL band that it's not even funny. (Kinda scary even). _

_Just listen to their songs "Written in Blood" (this one); "Tear You apart", and "True Romance". _

_Flipping awesome. _

_Also, excuse me if this isn't…the greatest lemon in town. Or…lime…whatever. _

_Please Review._


	9. True Romance

_Open your eyes and see me,  
Tell me that it's not too late.  
Whisper to me a sad song,  
Weighing us down in shame.  
I always said I believed you,  
You told me that was so cliché  
And with every kiss I resented you  
Because your feelings never got in the way_

_I know that you never loved me;  
I know that you never cared at all,  
Maybe just one more dance  
Cause that's as close as you're gettin' to a true romance_

_Open your heart and feel me,  
Tell me you don't feel the same.  
I dig down deep for forgiveness,  
And still you're busy placing the blame.  
This isn't about right or wrong now,  
It's not about wasted time.  
I should have paid closer attention,  
But I didn't bother reading the signs._

_I know that you never loved me;  
I know that you never cared at all,  
No my love we can't be friends,  
In fact I liked you much better  
When you'd just pretend._

_Open your arms and hold me,  
Tell me it'll be alright.  
Tell me the thing you've never told a soul  
That keeps you up at night.  
When could you tell it was over?  
When did you turn on me?  
I'd cry if I thought it would change your mind  
Cry for the girl I hoped you to be._

_--_

Was it pretend? Was the way you looked at me always pretend; and maybe the way you touched me was just something fictional to distract me from the Kira case?

My lip is split and bleeding, but I just choose to ignore the slight stinging. I feel your angry gaze on the side of my head, and I want to smirk coyly at you just to make the situation worse.

Watrai hands me an ice pack to place over my bruised eye, and he almost 'forgets' to give you one, but a look from your father makes him anyway.

Our little fights always ends up in bruises, and Misa and your father giving me the evil eye for the rest of the day.

I sigh, and re-situate the ice pack over my slowly numbing eye. I want to pull you close and yell in your face; I want to ask you if all you did to me was fake! Even though I knew it was, that all you were trying to do was distract me away from Kira…somewhere in the deepest parts of my mind, I wanted it to be real.

It was only the sex that you cared about…

I sigh again.

_-_

_-_

_I love She Wants Revenge…_

_Hey, there's a poll on my profile that asks which of these drables you want to be made into a multichaptered fic. If you choose the 'other' option, please PM me which one._

_Please review._


	10. Odalisque

_They've come to find you, Odalisque. _

_As the light dies, horribly. _

_On a fire escape, you walk. _

_All rare, and resolved to drop..._

--

The police reports said that he had died.

A small, twisted smirk settled at his lips as he watched people mill into the subway; their names and dates of death all floated eerily above their heads.

Some would die tonight, others fifty years from now.

He lumbered gracelessly into the train and sat down with a plop. His red eyes swiveled over meaningless faces, and over the names he took no interest in viewing.

He noticed several pointedly staring at him, from the way he sat to the unruly mess of raven hair on the top of his head. His ruffled white shirt was stained from the various jams that he ate, and also there were definite splotches of dried blood from the two surveillance guards.

B flashed the people who were staring a wide, almost threatening grin.

The thin red pocket knife in his back pocket thudded softly up against a man's briefcase; B seemed not to take notice.

The skin throbbed around his eyes, and B winced only slightly to show his discomfort. The many skin graphs that had taken care of the burnt flesh still stung even though it was six months later.

He pretended to inspect the dried blood under his finger nails.

What was he going to do about L? His beloved had committed something indescribable and _knew_ the actions B was going to have to take…Though, two years was a long time to be alone. B smirked at this.

He remembered when L had come all the way from Winchester to America just to see him. He remembered watching his love alone, quietly typing away at the large computer that had rested on the hotel's floor.

B especially remembered wanting so desperately to wrap his hands around the graceful curve of L's neck, and watch his love squirm and gasp for air.

A hadn't loved L the way B did, and that was why A had killed himself. B loved L enough to kill _for_ him. And then, the bastard repaid B's love by being with _ANOTHER_?!

He lifted a ragged, bloody fingernail between his sharp teeth; B nibbled savagely at the dead skin. He didn't stop until the metallic tang of blood invaded his mouth.

"Do you need help?" The man with the brief case tensely asked, and glanced at the crimson bead that slid down B's pale, girlish looking wrist.

B popped his finger out of his mouth, glanced at the man's life-span and grinned cruelly. "You have no clue…"

-

_Lay your belly under mine_

_Naked under me, under me..._

_Such a filthy dimming shine_

_The way you kick and scream, kick and scream._

-

-

_I am SO excited! This November, my mother and I are going to go see The Decmeberists LIVE! We're going to Philadelphia, and the venue is called "The Electric Factory". I cannot wait._

_Anyway, I hope you guys liked this. This was originally supposed to be part two for "The Tain", but at the time, I didn't like the way it sounded. Now, it is part three. _

_Oh, B…why are you so fun to write? _

_Please review!_


	11. The Chimbley Sweep

_**Slight warning: Gender switch!Near**_

_--_

_"Oh lonely urchin," The widow cried, "I've not been 'swept' since the day my husband died."_

_Her cheeks a-blushing, her legs laid bare. Oh ship-wrecked there I'll shake you from your sleep..._

_--_

Tiny bubbles escaped her nose as she laid still under the hot water. Her blue eyes were squeezed tightly shut, and her arms were crossed over her bare chest like a stereotypical vampire. The men's bathing room was dark and eerily quiet save for the slight burps of the air bubbles as they burst to the surface.

This was how she got away from everything; sitting alone in the men's bathing room. It was a way for her to get away from this chosen persona of 'Near'; it was how she got away from test scores, Mello, and all the other children that stared at her pale body.

People constantly watched as Mello tried and tried to surpass Near, and how he always failed. That was how Near had gotten the fresh bruise on her skinny wrist.

With an under water sigh, the small girl broke the calm water's surface with sputtering breaths.

Water dripped down her small nose, and from her small pout of a mouth. Near sighed once more, and ran a petite hand through her shortly cropped hair.

"I'd thought that I'd find you here..." Near didn't jump as most people would have. She felt her heart speed up slightly at the soft monotone voice that was directed toward her chilly ear.

Her hands instinctively lifted to cover her bare torso, but pale long fingered hands stopped their slow travel. "Please don't." She heard L whisper beside her ear, causing tremors of...something to run down her spine.

"Why are you here?" Near managed to whisper back, turning to her idol.

L's dark eyes locked with her own ice-blue; Near felt his hands tighten slightly around her lower arms. "I wanted to see you." Was what he said, and their lips crashed together.

Their kisses were soft and curious at first; they were sweet little challenges to one another to see which of them would ignite the spark of...something. Then their kisses became more heated, and their hands more adventurous.

L's mouth descended down Near's pale neck; hands kneaded soft adolescent breasts, mewls and groans echoed through the large, almost cave-like bathing room.

Near's pale hands wove through L's raven hair, slightly damp from the hot air around them. Her heart thudded inside her chest, and could feel that his heart was also thrumming quickly.

She slid a hand from her death grip on his hair, and quickly slid it under L's white shirt. Her small fingers slid softly over an erect nipple, causing the detective to shudder pleasantly.

Near helped L slide out of his white shirt, which he threw carelessly to one side. Soft nips, sharp bites, and slobbery licks caused both to groan, and shift uncomfortably with their building want. Near traced the edge of L's navel, and smirked lightly when tremors shook his skinny shoulders.

They pressed their bodies close to each other, grinding their sexes together even though L was still partially clothed.

L's fingers slowly ran down Near's back, and to the girl's slightly flared hips. Goosebumps ran up and down both of them, and they sighed, knowing what the other wanted.

They didn't stop to think that Near _may_ be too young for this. They didn't stop to think that _maybe_ the girl should have kept her virginity for a few more years. After all, Near was only _fifteen_.

--

They weren't embarrassed as they laid on the bathing room's cool tiles, bare legs tangled and bodies nude. Near's head rested comfortably on L's bare chest, her eyes dazed and half lidded as she tried to fight off sleep. Their breathing had regulated from the groaning and panting that had taken place only thirty minutes before. One of L's long fingers absentmindedly played with Near's short white curls.

"You're leaving for Japan tomorrow."

"I am."

"...you might die."

"I suspect to."

Near didn't want to look up at L, knowing that if she did, her seemingly emotionless mask would crack. Somewhere in the vast expanses of Wammy's house, a large grandfather clock struck midnight.

Near looked up at the man she strived to success, and sighed. "Happy birthday, L." The man held her close, and she could almost sense a smile in his words.

"It's exactally what I wanted."

-

-

_I feel like such a pervert right now, and I'm loving every minute of it. _

_I've wanted to do an L/Near ficlet for a while now (okay, a month) but I'd never guess that Near would be Gender Switch!Near. Aww, he'd be a cute girl :D _

_Sarah, I know you're gonna review to tell me what a big pervert I am, and quiet honestly...I agree. _

_Please review my lovely readers! _


	12. Sleeping with Ghosts

_The sea's evaporating  
Though it comes as no surprise  
These clouds we're seeing  
They're explosions in the sky  
It seems it's written  
But we can't read between the line_

Hush  
It's okay  
Dry your eye  
Dry your eye  
Soulmate dry your eye  
Dry your eye  
Soulmate dry your eye  
Cause soulmates never die

This one world vision  
Turns us in to compromise  
What good's religion  
When it's each other we despise  
Damn the government  
Damn their killing  
Damn their lies

--

His hands were shaking as the gun was fired. His eyes were wide as the body fell to the floor with a loud thump. He felt his legs shaking underneath his skinny body, and soon he was retching loudly onto the floor.

He felt the cool metal of the hand cuffs around his girlish wrists as the police carried him away to the cruiser.

He didn't feel anything as they took his finger-prints, nor did he process a thing as a nurse checked his fluttering pulse.

Perhaps he was having a silent panic attack?

He could still see the way his lover's eyes accused and screamed betrayal as the inner light faded away from their lovely irises.

The nurse wiped away the dried blood that had splashed over one of his tear stained cheeks.

He swallowed the white medication she gave him.

--

_Hush  
It's okay  
Dry your eyes  
Dry your eyes  
Soulmate dry your eyes  
Dry your eyes  
Soulmate dry your eyes  
Cause soulmates never die_

Soulmates never die

_--_

_Angst-eh! I watched an AMV to this song (it was Light/L so apparently this little drabble is) which made me SOB. God, it was so sad --sniff-- Yeah, I know this is really strange...hee..._

_Please review!_


	13. The One You Love

_The mind has so many pictures  
Why can't I sleep with my eyes open  
The mind has so many memories  
Can you remember what it looks like when I cry_

I'm Trying, trying to tell you  
All that I can in a sweet and velvet tongue  
But no words ever could sell you  
Sell you on me after all that I have done

I'm only the one you love  
Am I only the one you love?  
The Lady Gloom and her hornets circling round  
Is now before us, the screaming's done without moving  
One little move and for sure you will be stung

I'm singing "Oh, Jerusalem oh, Jerusalem  
See what he's picked up in the park"  
Let's fk this awful art party  
Want you to make love to me and only to me in the dark

I'm only the one you love  
Am I only the one you love?

We've traded in our snap shots  
We're going through the motions  
Into the view, I'm leaving you  
Down Conduit Avenue into the early morning  
Into the early morning  
The one I love  
Are you only the one I love?

--

His long, pale fingers grip at my upper arms. His pink mouth, bruised from our fevered kissing, quiver; "Hm…ah…" My fingers run over the pert and sensitive flesh of his nipple, this cause soft mewls to come out of his mouth.

My other hand massages his scalp, damp with cool sweat. A bead runs down the side of his head where I lap it up, shivering at the salty taste of L.

He drags my hand from his scalp, and stares up me with foggy, lust riddled eyes. I scrape a nail over his nipple, and he squirms pleasantly. "Ah…L-Light-kun." His voice is breathless and so full of emotion. He pulls my hand to his hot, wet mouth and sucks at my middle finger. I moan, and almost loose myself with the way his tongue rolls so suggestively over the tip of my finger. My erection is stiff and bulging against the fabric of my pants.

L's hands travel to my forceful erection and he presses his cool palm against the throbbing member. "Nng!" I groan, and L smiles innocently.

"Please let me take care of that, Light-kun." He shimmied down the length of my torso, and began to unbutton my confining jeans. Pulling off my jeans, and then my underwear, L looked up at me with wide innocent eyes.

"Do it, Ryu." I breathe, and moan loudly as the pale detective takes my erection into his mouth. His lips close and widen over my shaft, creating small spots of pressure on the taunt skin. His hot tongue wraps gracefully around the head of my penis, and he plays coyly with the slit.

"Ah..Ahhmm…" I love the way he bobs his head up and down, gagging slightly. His long fingers wrap around the base of my shaft, and he begins to pump softly. "R-Ryu," I moan hotly. I look down through narrow eyes, and my hands become tangled in his raven tresses. He's blowing me close to my climax, and soon I see stars explode. A low, heady moan escapes me, and I feel myself cum into L's mouth.

I'm sweaty and exhausted; I lay roughly down on the bed, and L crawls beside me. I can see a slight stream of white cum that had dribbled on his chin during out activities.

"You can take care of it." I murmur huskily, and grin roguishly at L.

A soft pink flush covers his cheeks, and L stutters. "Would you like to watch, Light-kun?" I almost moan happily, but another grin tells him that yes, I would like to watch.

He slowly pulls down the zipper to his jeans, and biting his bottom lip, he slides off the blue denim from his narrow hips. I smirk wildly as he runs his hand down his chest in a provocative manner, and moaning lightly as he did so. His lithe fingers dance around the base of his hardened penis. I see goosebumps rise on his pale stomach as he fondles himself.

His hand motions become more erratic, and his breathing begins to hitch as he comes closer and closer to his climax. "Mm, ah…L-Light-kun." He twitches under my hot, heavy gaze, and a deep blush has covered his narrow face. Soon, he climaxes; his chest heaves with the task of trying to get oxygen back into his system.

I watch him fall onto the cushiony mattress beside me, and he presses his cool body close to my own, falling asleep.

-

-

_Fucking A. Just…fucking A. _

_Anyway, umm I'm not that great at lemons…or limes or whatever, so don't tell me that this sucks. Constructive criticism is appreciated. _

_Blahh, BLOW JOBS AND JACKING OFF! _

_I've been reading a lot of smut today; and by a lot of smut, I mean TON O' SMUT. I had to get this out of my system. :D _

_Oh! By the way (self pimping) please PLEASE check out my deviant art account. It's on my profile page where you click the little 'homepage' link. Leave a comment on my drawings or one of my photographs. There's this one fanart I drew called "Possession" (I like it a lot. Three words: L. Light. Bondage. Yeah…pretty much.)_

_Please review! _


	14. Sex and Candy

____

Hangin' round downtown by myself  
And I had so much time  
To sit and think about myself  
And then there she was  
Like double cherry pie  
Yeah there she was  
Like disco superfly  
I smell sex and candy here  
Who's that lounging in my chair  
Who's that casting devious stares  
In my direction  
Mama this surely is a dream

Hangin' round downtown by myself  
And I had too much caffeine  
And I was thinkin' 'bout myself  
And then there she was  
In double platform suede  
Yeah there she was  
Like disco lemonade  
I smell sex and candy here  
Who's that lounging in my chair  
Who's that casting devious stares  
In my direction  
Mama this surely is a dream  
Mama this surely is a dream  
Yeah mama this must be my dream

--

Kira closed his honey colored eyes slowly as the hot shower water slid down his lean back. A long, pianist type hand reached out and waywardly traced the base of his hardened penis, and down the taunt shaft. Small pants left his mouth as the death note user teased the warm flesh.

"_Does…Light-kun love me?"_ He let a silent moan escape his plush mouth as the black haired detective popped into his head.

_They're laying on his bed; the shades are drawn, and the door locked. He hovers above L's pale, lithe body; their pelvises are molded against each other, and their touching erections send bolts of electricity down their spines. A deep pink is set on L's narrow face, and Light smiles coyly down at him…_

"Nngah!" At this, Light's fingers danced over the head of his member. Perhaps a different approach? A more dominate role for him…

_L was on his knees, eyes screaming __**Fuck me!**__ but he voiced the opposite. "Ki-Kira." He hisses angrily, and Light feels an over-whelming high at hearing the detective stutter. _

He could _see_ the want his fantasy L had in his accusing black eyes, and this made small bursts of ecstasy jump thought his veins. No, he liked his small, soft spoken fantasy L. It was almost like the real thing when he laid in Light's arms…

"_Li-Light-kun…!" The detective gasps cutely as Light thrusts, hitting the man's prostate head-on. Light shuddered pleasantly, a guttural noise coming from his mouth. _

"Mm-ah, nng." He rumbled lowly, stifling the noise in case any of his family heard his masturbatory actions.

With a silent yelp, Kira let his climax shake his body. He narrowed his eyes to slits, and he could feel the sticky cum drip off his fingers and into the warm water of the shower.

-

-

'_Masturbatory' is a word…huh._

_Um, please check out my you tube account at: __http /user/ __xCrazySocksxX_

_With the colon in it and also not spaced :D It's a thanks to every one…and then me rambling -sweat drop-_

_Sorry this isn't the best. It's freaking 5:46 am here, and I haven't gone to bed yet. --sigh--_


	15. There's a Light that Never Goes out

_Take me out tonight  
Where there's music and there's people  
And they're young and alive  
Driving in your car  
I never never want to go home  
Because I haven't got one  
Anymore_

Take me out tonight  
Because I want to see people and I  
Want to see life  
Driving in your car  
Oh, please don't drop me home  
Because it's not my home, it's their  
Home, and I'm welcome no more

And if a double-decker bus  
Crashes into us  
To die by your side  
Is such a heavenly way to die  
And if a ten-ton truck  
Kills the both of us  
To die by your side  
Well, the pleasure - the privilege is mine

Take me out tonight  
Take me anywhere, I don't care  
I don't care, I don't care  
And in the darkened underpass  
I thought Oh God, my chance has come at last  
(But then a strange fear gripped me and I  
Just couldn't ask)

Take me out tonight  
Oh, take me anywhere, I don't care  
I don't care, I don't care  
Driving in your car  
I never never want to go home  
Because I haven't got one, da ...  
Oh, I haven't got one

And if a double-decker bus  
Crashes into us  
To die by your side  
Is such a heavenly way to die  
And if a ten-ton truck  
Kills the both of us  
To die by your side  
Well, the pleasure - the privilege is mine

Oh, There Is A Light And It Never Goes Out  
There Is A Light And It Never Goes Out

--

L never liked dance clubs. A small sigh left his mouth which wasn't audible to the small blonde Lolita beside him. "Misa…I wish to go home." He yelled over the music. She turned, held a hand to her pierced ear, and laughed loudly as someone cracked a joke.

He sighed once more. _My head is pounding…_ He thought crossly, standing up. "Where are you going!?" Misa asked loudly, looking up at him with heavily made up eyes. He simply pointed in the direction of the door. She pouted slightly, but once more laughed as another joke was cracked.

Loud European techno music blared from the floor-to-ceiling speakers; people grinded against each other, mimicking intercourse on the changing floor. The heavy scent of sweat and alcohol filled the law student's nostrils, causing him to gag slightly. _Why did I come again?_ L thought for the umpteenth time that evening.

He looked crossly down at his battered, and worn tennis sneakers, and gave an inaudible yelp as he fell to the compact floor. He accusingly lifted his black eyes to the person he had accidentally ran into. Their eyes met in a clash of sepia and onyx.

L opened his mouth in a shocked whisper (though through the music, only he knew that he had said anything at all.) "…Light…?"

"LIIIIIIIIIGHT!" Misa's voice broke through the jumble of noises, and L saw his child hood sweet heart (maybe it was too sappy to call the slightly older male that…but whatever…) cringe. The petite blonde parted the grinding crowd as if she were Moses and attacked the poor brunette.

She grinned and hugged the male to her small body, saying over and over that it was good to have her Light-kun back, and how was England!?

L only stared up at the gracefully built male and felt his heart constrict in his chest.

-

-

_AHHHH! Part two of "I know very well how I got my name"! Weeeee! This chapter is dedicated to our very own __**L LAWLIET! HAPPY BIRTHDAY**_

_**B: (smacks authoress in the face and grins creepily): "Lawli-pop! Happy **_Birthday_**! Hee, isn't that funny? BIRTHDAY? **_

_**Me: O.o (throws strawberry jam in a different direction and watches as B savagely runs to eat)**__ Now that…that is over…(shudders) I want to know how you guys like this! Please review and I'll make certain to reply._

_HAPPY HALLOWEEN, YO!_

_(as for the song...I would love to see someone make an AMV of this with Light...hee BAD PUNS FTW)_


	16. Rachael

_As Rachael starts to wonder was it hers to begin with,  
Or was the memory from someone else's sleep.  
'Cause there's a hole in her heart that still harbors a question,  
Whose answer just might break it so she's hanging on.  
At least it's her to keep.  
So I asked her..._

"What if this does not belong to you,  
And all these things you thought were true  
Turned out to just be someone else's lies."  
Baby this does not belong to you,  
This does not belong to you

_--_

Misa's blue eyes widened as she watched a dreadful smile play at the corners of her Kira's lips.

"I'm hungry for his presence, and when I think of the wonderful soul that is hidden away in that little ivory body, I'm filled with _want_."

"How can you say such things!?" The girl cried, throwing her body over his to give the man a breathless hug. "He wants you dead and all you can think of is…is carnal desires?!" She wiped two fat tears away from her blue irises. Dark honey colored eyes glared the girl down until she was sniveling in fear.

"Misa," Light began in a softer tone. She instantly relaxed. "I will seduce L and whilst doing so, I will trick him into giving me his name." She seemed entranced by his words; he felt the beast within him purr in delight at how easily she bent under his will.

"Now," His possessive voice had returned and she seemed to snap out of her entranced state. "Undress."

He felt no pleasure at having her underneath him. He did this so that the woman wouldn't go running to the police or have her shinigami kill him. As if she ever would.

A gleeful smile overtook his mouth as he thrusted deeply within her. Misa gave a loud scream of pleasure, and Light shuddered slightly at the shrill quality of it. No, he wanted something deeper, he wanted a gasping baritone. He wanted boney, skeletal white fingers with knobby knuckles clawing desperately at his back. Light shuddered with how his thoughts were proceeding, and felt Misa convulse beneath him.

He released with a quiet grunt and pulled out of her still gasping body. "Li…ght…where are you…aren't you staying?" Misa propped her curvy body on her elbows to gaze longingly as he dressed. He spared her a glance (actually, it was the mere flashing of the eyes.)

"You know I have work to do." The blonde woman pursed her scarlet lips at the word 'work'.

As he left, she allowed herself one tear. "Why is your pride more important than me?"

_-_

_There's a fleck in her eye that no one ever noticed,  
A pretty birthmark for such a beautiful face.  
All the men from her past seem to have left her abandoned,  
I guess there's some things that you can never erase._

I've seen her play with her hair in a moment of tension,  
I've seen her with her guard down ready to cry.  
But there's a whole in her heart that still harbors the question,  
Whose answer just might break it, still she's hanging on,  
'cause no one wants to die.  
Then she asked me...

"What if this does not belong to you,  
And all the things you thought were true  
Turned out to just be someone else's lies."  
Baby this does not belong to you,  
This does not belong to you,  


-

_I feel really bad for doing this to Misa, man. This song is by She Wants Revenge and it is called 'Rachael'. It's very good. _

Please review!


	17. A Cautionary Song

_There's a place your mother goes when everybody else is soundly sleeping;  
through the lights of Beacon Street and if you listen you can hear her weeping, she's weeping, 'cause the gentlemen are calling and the snow is softly falling on her petticoats. And she's standing in the harbor and she's waiting for the sailors in the 'jolly boat'. See how they approach._

With dirty hands and trousers torn they grapple 'til she's safe within their keeping. A gag is placed between her lips to keep her sorry tongue from any speaking, or screaming. And they row her out to packets where the sailor's sorry racket calls for maidenhead. And she's scarce above the gunwales when her clothes fall to a bundle and she's laid in bed on the upper deck.

And so she goes from ship to ship, her ankles clasped, her arms are rudely pinioned.'Til at last she's satisfied the lot of the marina's teeming minions, in their opinion.

And they tell her not to say a thing to cousin, kindred, kith or kin or she'll end up dead. And they throw her thirty dollars and return her to the harbor where she goes to bed, and this is how you're fed.

So be kind to your mother, though she may seem an awful bother, and the next time she tries to feed you collard greens, remember what she does when you're asleep  


-

He didn't know where his guardian went during the late hours of night; Mello noticed that his raven haired guardian normally left after the man thought he had gone to sleep, but Mello knew better.

The blonde haired boy watched as L stumbled through their shack-like house's thin door through narrowed eyes. He watched as Near, the other street urchin L had taken under his wing, sprung up to help the limping man.

The boy's childish curiosity soon got the better of him, and he asked the albino toy lover one night where L went every evening.

Near glanced at him with hooded ice-blue eyes and replied calmly, "He whores himself to dock workers and sailors. It's so we have money to eat." The boy twirled a lock of hair between two deft fingers. "Please don't say anything." '_Or they'll kill him_' was the underlying message.

Mello stiffly nodded, shut his mouth and tried to sleep.

-

-

_Please review :D_


	18. I Know

_Youve got such a pretty smile  
Its a shame the things you hide behind it  
Let em go  
Give it up for a while  
Let em free and we will both go find it_

_I know theres nowhere you can hide it  
I know the feeling of alone  
I know that you do not feel invited  
But, come back, come back in from the cold_

_Tell me how you really feel  
Tell me what is on the inside of you  
All the somethings you conceal  
Only keep away the ones who love you_

_Step away then from the edge  
Your best friend is life is not your mirror  
Back away, come away  
Back away, come away  
Back away, come away  
Back away, come away  
Back away, come away  
Back away, come away  
I am here and I will be forever_

_I know theres nowhere you can hide it  
I know the feeling of alone  
Trust me and dont keep that on the inside  
Soon youll be locked out on your own_

_Youre not alone  
Youre not alone  
And dont say youve never been told  
'Ill be with you til we grow old'  
til Im in the ground and Im cold  
Im not sitting up here on some throne  
Like a dog you can always come home  
Dig up a bone  
Look around_

-

"He's hurting you. Why do you go back to him?" Light snapped, following my long shuffling steps at a trot. I stopped suddenly, and turned, a scowl on my face and tears welling unwillingly in my eyes.

"Because you weren't there when I needed you." I choked out, "Because I thought he was someone that I could have trusted."

"You can trust me L, I won't hurt you." Light's voice had gotten softer; it was almost pleading.

My jaw trembled slightly, and yet I held my angry, self-pitying tears back. "Light, you have no idea what he would to me...or to you if he found out about what you and I had." I turned on my heal, beginning to walk away but stopped as Light grabbed my bruised wrist.

"He did this to you." He stated in a low calm voice, "Who is to say that he won't do something worse?"

And finally I cried.

-

-

_A preview to a multi chaptered fic I'm thinking about doing after I finish No Refunds. It's gonna be sad. :D_

_Please review guys. _


	19. My Mother was a Chinese Trapeze Artist

_My mother was a Chinese trapeze artist  
In pre-war Paris  
Smuggling bombs for the underground.  
And she met my father  
At a fete in Aix-en-Provence.  
He was disguised as a Russian cadet  
in the employ of the Axis.  
And there in the half-light  
Of the provincial midnight  
To a lone concertina  
They drank in cantinas  
And toasted to Edith Piaf  
And the fall of the Reich._

My sister was born in a hovel in Burgundy  
And left for the cattle  
But later was found by a communist  
Who'd deserted his ranks  
To follow his dream  
To start up a punk rock band in South Carolina.  
I get letters sometimes.  
They bought a plantation  
She weeds the tobacco  
He offends the nation  
And they write, "Don't be a stranger, y'hear."  
"Sincerely, your sister."

So my parents had me  
To the disgust of the prostitutes  
On a bed in a brothel.  
Surprisingly raised with tender care  
'Til the money got tight  
And they bet me away  
To a blind brigadier in a game  
Of high stakes canasta.  
But he made me a sailor  
On his brigadier ship fleet.  
I know every yardarm  
From main mast to jib sheet.  
But sometimes I long to be landlocked  
And to work in a bakery.

-

"…Tell me your story."

Near stood in L's doorway with a brown teddy-bear clenched in his tiny hands. His grey eyes watched as the raven haired male looked up from the thick law book that the asylum had let him keep, and as he shuffled across the small room to close and lock the door behind the small fifteen year old.

They sat on the thin cot with the equally thin sheets; Near squeezed the teddy-bear closer to his stomach, not out of fear (because he felt anything but that) but just out of pure instinct.

L's dark eyes didn't study his doll-like face, but they stared at something above his eyebrow and in his curly white hair. Near could tell that he was thinking back over the many fantastical lies that he had told over the years, which caused the boy's sock covered feet to twitch slightly on the dirty carpet. He knew that the raven haired male wasn't schizophrenic, unlike the Yagami boy in room 303 who's padded cell swallowed his screams of demons following him, telling him to kill; Near had seen L go into the boy's room long after everyone was supposed to be asleep with apples under his white shirt.

The male dropped his dark eyes to Near's equally dark orbs with a corner of his lip twitching. He took a shallow breath, and opened his mouth, cocking his head to the side as if thinking. "My mother…was sold by my grandfather to pay off his gambling debts. She was the star of the certain brothel he had sold her too, but the leering men, and nights of bought, plastic sex caused my mother to go slightly…mad." L's cold fingers had started to undo the tiny white buttons of Nears shirt. The albino child didn't even bat an eyelash as the other male's white fingertips skimmed on his skin. "So…she ran away. She ran into the desert where she knew her 'master's' wouldn't be able to track her. For fifteen days," L began to push Near onto the thin cot, pushing the white material off of his shallow shoulders. "She wandered; she started to hallucinate, and soon she passed out from pure exhaustion. My grandmother found her only a day later."

Near let the teddy-bear fall to the dirty carpet riddled with dust and candy wrappers. He felt L's lips skim over the hallow of his collar bone, and he softly sighed. They lived in the asylum, social rejects because of their mental, or birth defects. L's happened to be that he was a compulsive liar, and a sexual deviant. It was something Near didn't like to reflect upon.

"My mother soon woke up and found that she was living amongst gypsies. For three years, she lived with out problems, then my father returned to his camp." L bit down rather savagely on Near's shoulder, causing the white skin to quickly redden. Near bit his lip to keep from crying out in pain. He felt L's spidery fingers rest on his flat chest, where a skeletal finger traced the outside of his nipple.

"They…'fell in love' (_bullshit._) He married her after he found out that she was pregnant with me. For ten years of my life, he was barely there because he didn't care about my mother, and especially me. He resented me because I looked so much like him." He spoke against Near's thin neck and shuddered slightly. "On the eve of my eleventh birthday, my father killed the entire camp. My grandmother, my aunts, uncles, cousins: they all died because of him." His spidery fingers twisted painfully tight in Near's snowy white hair, which caused Near to whimper softly.

"Then…he set fire to the tents; this was to try to kill my mother and myself, but my mother took me and tried to run into the desert. My father followed her, grabbed me by my hair," He yanked back Near's head, and whispered against his ashen neck, "And whispered to me: '_You are not my son.'_ I then watched as he lifted his blood spattered arm, and shot my mother five times in her forehead. He then turned his hate filled eyes toward me and spat in my face, throwing me to the sand. He shot me in the leg so I wouldn't be able to go anywhere and then left me, the only survivor, to die."

L stilled his hand, and uncurled his fingers from the boy's hair. He looked down into Near's still expressionless face, and into his teary grey eyes. L sighed a long sigh, and got up from the cot. Even after the many times Near had visited L, and heard the different versions of how his mother died and his father left him, the male had never done anything more than fondle the boy.

"And then what did you do?" Near asked, sitting up on the stretched canvas, pulling up and buttoning his shirt.

"I watched as the Queen came and took me to live with her…where I…" L's eyes then took on a blank look, and he turned to Near with a confused expression on his normally blank face. "Who are you?" Near sighed, picked up his bear and unlocked the door.

He clicked the door closed, and faced the dark wood. He could hear Raito weeping down the hall…

-

-

_Oh Jesus…I made L a se_x _addict. _

_Please review!!!_


	20. Not about Love

_The early cars  
Already are  
Drawing deep breaths past my door  
And last night's phrases  
Sick with lack of basis  
Are still writhing on my floor_

And it doesn't seem fair  
That your wicked words should work  
In holding me down  
No, it doesn't seem right  
To take information  
Given at close range  
For the gag  
And the bind  
And the ammunition round

Conversation once colored by esteem  
Became duologue as a diagram of a play for blood  
Took a vacation, my palate got clean  
Now I could taste your agenda  
While you're spitting your cud

And it doesn't make sense  
I should fall for the kingcraft of a meritless crown  
No, it doesn't seem right  
To take information  
Given at close range  
For the gag  
And the bind  
And the ammunition round

This is not about love  
'Cause I am not in love  
In fact I can't stop falling out

This is not about love  
'Cause I am not in love  
In fact I can't stop falling out  
I miss that stupid ache

What is this posture  
I have to stare at  
That's what he said when I'm sittin' up straight  
Change the name of the game 'cause he lost  
And he knew he was wrong but he knew it too late  
But I'm not being fair  
'Cause I chose to listen to that filthy mouth  
But I'd like to choose right  
Take all the things that I've said that he stole  
Put 'em in a sack  
Swing 'em over my shoulder  
Turn on my heels  
Step out of this sight  
Try to live in a lovelier light

This is not about love  
'Cause I am not in love  
In fact I cant stop falling out

This is not about love  
'Cause I am not in love  
In fact i cant stop falling out  
I miss that stupid ache  
-

L refused to acknowledge the warm feeling he got whenever he happened to glance out of the corner of his wide eyes, and trace the edge of the boy's jaw with his normally probing gaze. He would lick his suddenly sticky lips, a newly picked up sign of nervousness that only Watari would notice.

Raito leaned over him to reach for something across the table, causing L to tense his boney shoulders, and almost drop the sugary candy that he held in his fingers. The detective's proverbial hackles rose as Raito took his sweet time in flipping through the stack of papers. The boy made a small noise to himself that no one was supposed to hear, but his being L's personal bubble caused a small tremor to run up and down the poor detective's spine.

"Oh, sorry Ryuuzaki." Was all Raito said, and he sat down, seemingly ignoring L's tense state.

If only L knew.

-

-

_Huh? I love this song, it's by Fiona Apple, and it's very good. It reminded me of Light and L when I listened to it again. :D_


	21. Evil Angel

_For to see my depth of sorrow  
You are not allowed to follow me  
Into this town square  
And then run away_

Evil angel with your cleft tongue  
When you kissed me  
On this town square  
All the lights came on at sunset  
Thought you'd stay

Evil angel bearing apples  
When you kissed me  
On this drawbridge  
As the boats do  
How was I to know you'd flee

Tear down these monuments  
Bury the coat of arms  
And build for me a factory

Evil angel when you're faced with hatred's  
Daggers in my honor  
You're no match no scratching hearts that no longer bleed

Oh Evil angel tear down the monuments  
Evil angel Bury the coat of arms  
And rebuild for me these memories  
For to see my depth of sorrow

_-_

_-_

_**Their lips brushed as they fought; they stilled, and stared at each other with wide eyes. There was a shock of electricity that bolted down both of their spines (his perfectly straight, and his arched); spit became heavy as it coagulated in their throats, stopping all rational thinking. **_

_**A sort-of kiss, something that shouldn't of happened. **_

_**-**_

L stared up at his beautiful poison; blood pounded in his ears as his heart clenched painfully in his chest. A slow smirk spread over Raito's lips as the read light from the computer as a large red 'alert' flashed on the screen.

No…no it shouldn't have happened like this, but he had heard the bells (loud and clear) as he stood, drenched, on the rooftop. Raito had come for him, and when drying off, they had shared a sour/sweet, bitter tasting kiss.

And L had tasted betrayal.

_**-**_

_**-**_

_Soo…sorry I haven't updated ANYTHING in a couple of weeks. I would give you a large tale of misery and woe but…really I was too lazy to update. :D_

_The song is by Rufus Wainwright and it's called 'Evil Angel'. I just heard YAOI in it when I heard it...then again, Rufus is gay! Please Review!:D_


	22. These Things

_There is nothing to see here people keep moving on  
Slowly their necks turn and then they're gone  
No one cares when the show is done_

Standing in line and its cold and you want to go  
Remember a joke so you turn around  
There is no one to listen so you laugh by yourself

I heard it's cold out, but her popsicle melts  
She's in the bathroom, she pleasures herself  
Says I'm a bad man, she's locking me out  
It's cause of these things, it's cause of these things

Let make a fast plan, watch it burn to the ground  
I try to whisper, so no one figures it out  
I'm not a bad man, I'm just overwhelmed  
It's cause of these things, it's cause of these things

The crowd on the street walks slowly, don't mind the rain  
Lovers hold hands to numb the pain,  
Gripping tightly to something that they will never own

And those by themselves by choice or by some reward  
No mistakes only now you're bored  
This is the time of your life but you just can't tell  


"What made you believe that he 'wanted it'?" The police men are all the same; they ask the same questions over and over again like it's some holy mantra, and if they keep repeating it, it'll help them get through life.

I lift my eyes, vacant and unseeing (a mask to hide my 'wrong' feelings; created out of years of 'just peeping') to the double-chinned face of the man 'interrogating' me. I cock my head to one side and allow my mask to slightly crack, showing my amusement to him. "Well, how do you know that some girl at some bar wants you, Officer? How do you _know_ that she's randy enough to want _you_ to crawl and spasm on top of her?" The officer's face slowly turned a pleasant purple shade and I let another minute crack appear in my mask. "I just _did_, sir."

The man lumbered around the chair and desk they've sat me at; his meaty hands began to crumple up the skinny file they had on me, and his beady eyes look anywhere but my face. They rest on the once starchy white paper, and I see them zoom across the page. "…Nick Peterson was found three days after his disappearance in _your_ hotel room, Mr. Lawliet." I slid my feet out of my barely-there tennis shoes and twiddle my toes like someone who would twiddle their thumbs. I bobbed my head up and down to show him that I was listening to his idle chatter.

"Yes, yes I've heard this all before, Officer, I can assure you that." I wanted to chew on something sweet, but the '_oh so nice_' police officers only allowed me four sugars in my coffee rather than my usual sixteen. I played with the cellophane cup. "I know that you found him bound, gagged, rapped _extensively __**several**_times, and dead. I was the only DNA you clowns could pull off the body, and so you caught me." I snorted and closed my eyes as if savoring something spectacular.

"My fun has come to an end. _Se dissoudre._" I had allowed them to catch me because it wasn't any fun to kidnap those boys and rape them till they were black and blue; I didn't get anything out of it, just like I didn't when I had first started. _Ten years ago._

I heard the officer's heavy breath come from above me; I watched with slowly raising interest as his square hands clenched into tight, _tight_ fists. "Are you going to hit me?" I asked a little breathlessly, feeling my heart start to beat quickly in my head.

I remembered little Nick Peterson's hands as he beat at my back, wailing for me to stop, _to let him go_. I didn't, and ended up choking him with his own sock.

The _only_ raise I EVER got out of doing what I did was because of the promise of a beating…

"Y-you sick _fuck_." The _nice_ police officer said, stepping away from me to compose himself. "I'm…I'm gonna make sure you're _never_ getting out." I felt loud laughter begin to bubble up from the tips of my toes.

"Is that a promise Officer Peterson?"

-

-

_Soo…the tables of crazy are turned. :O _

_Instead of making B the MO-FO CRAZEH SHIZIT, we all know and love, I made it L. Aaand…he rapes little boys. I was doing the dishes and thinking of a certain CSI episode when I got hit with a bout of inspiration. I'm sorry that I haven't updated on anything of importance, but hey…that's life. _

_What the little bit of French means is: "come to an end"_

_The song is by 'She wants Revenge'_

PLEASE REVIEW.


	23. The Ballad of Sweeny Todd

_Attend the tale of Sweeney Todd.  
His skin was pale and his eye was odd.  
He shaved the faces of gentlemen  
who never thereafter were heard of again.  
He trod a path that few have trod  
did Sweeney Todd  
the demon barber of fleet street.  
He kept a shop in London town.  
Of fancy clients and good renown  
and what if none of their souls were saved  
they went to their maker impecably shaved.  
By Sweeney,  
by Sweeney Todd  
the demon barber of fleet street._

Company

Swing your razor wide!  
Sweeney, hold it to the skies.  
Freely flows the blood of those who moralize.  
His needswere few, his room was bare.  
A lavabo and a fancy chair.  
A mug of suds, and a leather strop,  
an apron, a towel, a pail, and a mop.  
For neatness he deserves a nod,  
does Sweeney Todd,  
the demon barber of Fleet Street.  
Inconspicuous Sweeney was,  
quick, and quiet and clean he was.  
Back of his smile, under his word,  
Sweeney heard music that nobody heard.  
Sweeney pondered and Sweeney planned,  
like a perfect machine he planned,  
Sweeney was smooth, Sweeney was subtle,  
Sweeney would blink, and rats would scuttle  
Sweeney was smooth, Sweeney was subtle  
Sweeney would blink, and rats would scuttle  
Sweeney was smooth, Sweeney was subtle,  
Sweeney would blink, and rats would scuttle  
Sweeney was smooth, Sweeney was subtle,  
Sweeney would blink, and rats would scuttle  
Sweeney! Sweeney! Sweeney! Sweeney!  
Sweeney!

Sweeney Todd  


-

He regarded the small detective with a murderous glint in his normally warm honey eyes. The hand around L's swan-like throat tightened, causing the detective to sputter and claw at the teen's hand for air. "I'm going to have to punish you, aren't I?" Raito--or Kira, if the scarlet tint to the honey eyes was any indication-- purred, a slow smirk sliding over his plush mouth.

"R-Rai…to…!" L gasped, tears beginning to moisten his gray eyes; Raito didn't feel any thing as he watched the detective cling to life.

The boy looked over the older male's shoulder, and his eyes visibly brightened as they landed on the smiling surface of a silver knife. "I think I know what to do, Lawliet." He whispered, and plucked the knife from the speckled surface of the counter.

L's eyes widened even more, causing them to look as if they were bulging from the sockets. "N…o…" He ground out, trying to writhe away from boy's iron clad grip. Raito laughed evilly, and brought the sharp blade closer to the man's porcelain face.

L's struggling became more desperate, yet Raito pressed the blade to the unmarred flesh. He dragged the silver across L's cheek, causing the man's white shirt front to become stained with crimson blood. L's pathetic screams filled Raito's ears like a sweet drug.

An hour later, Raito let the knife drop to the floor. It stuck in the colored tiles of the kitchen; He surveyed L's broken, twitching body with a large, insane smile on his face.

L lifted his gray eyes up to Raito; his tears were mixed with his blood that poured profusely from the deep gashes the boy had made. "…w-w-why?" He coughed, clenching his eyes closed from the burning pain.

Raito giggled and leaned down to his beautifully, broken angel. "Because you sinned against God, Lawliet…"

-

-

_M'kay…why did I use the ballad of Sweeny Todd? Oh wells…_

_HOLY MUFFIN CRAB-CAKES, SATURDAY THROUGH MONDAY I'LL BE IN CHICAGO. I ARE EXCITED. :D_

_Please review. :D_


	24. Lolita nie en Bloc

__

Lolita denies in block it

_sails__ with far under  
lashes with hundred miles to suspect that them  
silences and the jealousy __watch__ for it forgets  
the list and the lengthening-piece still she wants to insulate herself  
and then it is absorbed in contemplation  
of its feet_

an angel passes  
an angel passes

and then its finger describes in the air of stars  
or many flashes she is unaware of so superbly  
the feelings the risks of the _love__ it advances  
towards the lascive abandoned __window__ and it  
cover the sky of thousand strange and unknown signs of all_

an angel passes  
an angel passes

afflicted lola I did not know to decipher the direction  
secrecy of your aired slow gestures, shows or  
futile _magic__ unless the vacuum and the trouble  
do not seize you Lolita and if this full bubble  
of nothing wanted to burst itself finally_

an angel passes  
an angel passes

_-_

He couldn't deny anything to him.

The boy was truly an angel, and as he watched him, the man felt like a looming gargoyle with dripping claws and talons.

Was he another Humbert Humbert wanting to snatch away the seemingly 'innocent' Dolores Haze? No, he knew he wasn't a character in a Vladimir Nabokov novel…

Skinny, delicate hands flew over the painted faces of dolls; there was a finger twisting painfully in curling white hair as the man watched him. The boy stilled his fingers until they ripped the painted head from the doll's body. He dropped the cloth body to the floor with a fabric thump, and lifted his eyes to stare, seemingly bored, at the man.

He cocked his softly made face to one side, just as the man did, and waited for the gargoyle to move.

Dolores Haze indeed.

-

_Lolita nie en bloc elle navigue au loin sous  
Les cils a cent lieues de se douter que les  
Silences et la jalousie la guettent elle oublie  
La liste et l'allonge encore elle veut s'isoler  
Et alors elle s'absorbe dans la contemplation  
De ses pieds_

Un ange passe  
Un ange passe

Et puis son doigt décrit dans l'air des étoiles  
Ou bien des éclairs elle ignore si superbement  
Les sentiments les aléas de l'amour elle s'avance  
Vers la fenêtre abandonnée lascive et elle  
Couvre le ciel de mille signes étranges et inconnus de tous

Un ange passe  
Un ange passe

Désolé Lola je n'ai pas su déchiffrer le sens  
Secret de tes gestes lents aérés, simulacres ou  
Magie futile a moins que le vide et l'ennui  
Ne s'emparent de toi Lolita et si cette bulle pleine  
De rien voulait se crever enfin

Un ange passe  
Un ange passe

_-_

_-_

_I suggest you listen to this band 'Desir Noir'. They are very good. _


	25. Johnny are you Queer?

_Johny what's the deal boy  
Is your love for real boy  
when the lights are low  
You never hold me close Now I saw you today boy  
Walking with them gay boys  
Now you hurt me so, now I gotta know Johny are you queer?  
'Cause when I see you dancing with your friends  
I can't help wondering where I stand_

I'm so afraid I'll lose you  
If I can't seduce you  
Is there something wrong?  
Johny come on strong.

Why are you so weird, boy?  
Johny are you queer boy?  
When I make a play  
You're pushing me away

'Cause when I see you dancing with your friends  
I can't help wondering where I stand

Johny you've forsaken  
A love you could be takin'  
I want to give it to you,  
But you never come through

Oh, why are you so weird, boy? Johny are you queer boy? When you asked for a date  
I thought that you were straight.  
But Johny are you queer?

Johny are you queer boy?  
-

"Is Light-kun gay?" The question hung in the air like a fat fly before slowly falling and silently exploding on the dusty floor riddled with discarded candy wrappers. L felt Light's wide eyes on him; Cheif Yagami's mouth was wide, and Matsuda started giggling dispite himself.

"...WHAT!?" Light finally yelled, standing up from his rolling chair. L's arm was jerked away from opening his thirteen candy as Light tried to grab his white shirt.

"I asked a simple question, and I do not like to repet myself Light-kun." L muttered, trying to take his arm back.

"NO!" L finally turned his pitless eyes away from the glowing computer screen and smiled a tiny, mischevious smile up at the younger man.

"Then why did you try and kiss me last night?"

-

-

_err, yeah..."Johnny are you Queer"...perfect song for Light, non? :D_


	26. Under the Milky Way

__

Sometimes when this place gets kind of empty,  
Sound of their breath fades with the light.  
I think about the loveless fascination,  
Under the milky way tonight.

Lower the curtain down in Memphis,  
Lower the curtain down all right.  
I got no time for private consultation,  
Under the milky way tonight.

Wish I knew what you were looking for.  
Might have known what you would find.  
Wish I knew what you were looking for.  
Might have known what you would find.

And its something quite peculiar,  
Something that's shimmering and white.  
Leads you here despite your destination,  
Under the milky way tonight  
Under the milky way tonight.

_-_

Mello remembered the first time he had ever met Near. At the time, he had no clue that the small albino child was female, and if he would have ever found out, he really wouldn't have cared.

All he knew was that the kid was getting attention from L, and that pissed him off.

He was twelve, and Near was eleven when they first met. A dark scowl covered his face when L had visited them before he left to go to America to solve the LABB murder case. He was jealous of the skinny white kid who clung to L as if the detective was the only thing holding him (because that's what the children of the orphanage were told Near _was_) to the Earth.

He followed them with a small pout as Near said to L that he wanted to speak to the detective alone. Mello barely contained the gasp of outraged surprise as Near began to weep to L that "owed himself" to the twenty-one year old; then L kissed Near. On the mouth.

Mello ran away then, but not before he heard L whisper lowly, "I'll hold you to it."

Angry tears stung his eyes, and Mello gobbled savagely at a large chunk of chocolate. Matt asked him what 'the hell was wrong', but Mello fixed the red-head with a glare, shutting the gamer up.

To have someone fall in love with you, keep ignoring them; play hard to get, that's what people say anyway. It seemed to be working on Mello anyway.

Every time, EVERY TIME Near brushed off his threats and the new bruises, it made his head spin and his blood boil pleasantly.

The albino 'boy' had hit puberty he suspected; a delicate face was being carved out of the soft round face of the newly turned thirteen year old. Dark eyelashes framed grey eyes, and a softly upturned nose sweetly adorned the 'boy's' face. He spoke in a soft monotone that silently mocked, and it sent Mello reeling.

There were also those dreams to be put into consideration.

Class proved to be most difficult to keep his charade up.

On the albino boy's fifteenth birthday, a surprise gripped Whammy's House: L was coming home.

Strange as it was, Mello knew he was jealous of _L_ rather than Near.

The children of Whammy's greeted the eccentric detective with laughing, hugs and home-baked goods.

Mello greeted the man he planned on succeeding with a brittle, fake smile. The detective must have noticed his acting because the man greeted him with an off-hand, "Hello Mihael." Mello nodded and looked behind his shoulder to scan the small crowd of children to see if Near had come to greet L. He wasn't there, and that gave Mello a slight, sick satisfaction.

"Hm." He twitched in irritation as L strode past him with his thumb situated in his mouth.

Dinner, Near wasn't there either. Mello let his eyes dart around the small dinning hall, trying to catch a glimpse of white anywhere. A small sigh of defeat escaped his mouth, and Matt looked up from devouring his plate of food to raise a red eyebrow. Mello acted as if he had no clue as to what Matt was silently asking.

He stayed up late, and finally saw with jubilation as Near crept out from his hiding spot. Mello followed Near into the men's bathing room, and an inaudible gasp left his mouth as the 'boy' undressed.

Slightly flared hips and a small pubescent bust greeted his shocked and thrilled gaze.

_Near…_his mind gasped, _oh god…oh my __**god**__. _

He watched with greedy, hungry eyes as the girl washed, and with a heated blush, found that he felt insanely dirty for enjoying it so much.

He hid where he knew Near wouldn't see him; his hackled rose when a low monotone voice rang through the bathroom. "I thought I'd find you here." Mello watched as Near made a move to cover her chest, but L stopped the action.

"What are you doing here?" Near asked, curious.

"To see you." Mello bit his lips closed as they began to kiss; he bit until he could taste coppery blood, and still he tried not to scream.

A darker blush crept over his face as he watched their hurried, awkward 'love-making'.

They climaxed with a shout, and Mello felt his burning anger toward L (and Near) grow into hot resentment.

His legs weren't able to move, and he stayed glued to the bathroom floor. Mello watched as they laid together; anger, and jealousy dropped hard in his gut as he watched L toy with a strand of Near's white hair. Their breathing had returned to a normal tempo, and Mello watched as Near looked curiously up at the eccentric detective.

"You'll be leaving for Japan tomorrow, right?"

"Yes."

"…you might die."

"I suspect to."

Mello cringed, remembering that L had taken on the Kira case, and that it was fairly certain that he might die…

-

He waited an hour longer as he watched the two get dressed. Mello watched, frowning, as L kissed Near softly goodbye.

L walked out of the bathroom, leaving a small almost broken looking Near; Mello's anger was beginning to ebb away while he watched Near wipe away tiny tears.

_I'm sorry, Near._ Mello and unknowably, L thought.

-

-

_Aaand, we're back to angst. :D Nahaha, Sarah, you're favorite coupling (L/Near). "This is weird." "Yeah, I know. Get off."_

_Part two of 'The Chimbley Sweep'. M'yep. _


	27. The Fallen

__

Some say you're trouble, boy  
Just because you like to destroy  
All the things that bring the idiots joy  
Well, what's wrong with a little destruction?

And the Kunst won't talk to you  
Because you kissed St Rollox Adieu  
Because you robbed a supermarket or two  
Well, who gives a damn about the prophets of Tesco?

Did I see you in a

___limousine__  
Flinging out the fish and the unleavened  
Turn the rich into wine  
Walk on the mean  
For the fallen are the virtuous among us  
Walk among us  
Never judge us  
Yeah we're all..._

Up now and get 'em, boy  
Up now and get 'em, boy  
Drink to the devil and death at the doctors

Did I see you in a limousine  
Flinging out the fish and the unleavened  
Five thousand users fed today  
As you feed us  
Won't you lead us  
To be blessed

So we stole and drank Champagne  
On the seventh seal you said you never feel pain  
"I never feel pain, won't you hit me again?"  
"I need a bit of black and blue to be a rotation"

In my blood I feel the bubbles burst  
There was a flash of fist, an eyebrow burst  
You've a lazy laugh and a red white shirt  
I fell to the floor fainting at the sight of blood

Did I see you in a limousine  
Flinging out the fish and the unleavened  
Turn the rich into wine  
Walk on the mean  
Be they Magdalene or virgin you've already been  
You've already been and we've already seen  
That the fallen are the virtuous among us  
Walk among us  
Never judge us to be blessed

So I'm sorry if I ever resisted  
I never had a doubt you ever existed  
I only have a problem when people insist on  
Taking their hate and placing it on your name

Some say you're trouble, boy  
Just because you like to destroy  
You are the word, the word is 'destroy'  
I break this bottle and think of you fondly  
Did I see you in a limousine  
Flinging out the fish and the unleavened  
To the whore in a hostel  
Or the scum of a scheme  
Turn the rich into wine  
Walk on the mean  
It's not a jag in the arm  
It's a nail in the beam  
On this barren Earth  
You scatter your seed  
Be they Magdalene or virgin  
You've already been  
Yeah, you've already been  
We've already seen  
That the fallen are the virtuous among us  
Walk among us  
If you judge us  
We're all damned

_-_

His messy sneakers slapped on the cracked concrete as his red eyes swept over the scene of a busy Tokyo street. He could hear the rumbling subway beneath his feet, and as he walked safely away from the main line, the screams that followed his small attack on the occupants inside.

B smirked slowly down at the oil stained sidewalk; his hand twitched lightly in his pocket as he fiddled with the small red button that detonated the bomb he had placed under his subway seat.

-

-

_Such a long song for like…two paragraphs. "The Fallen" by Franz Ferdinand. They're a great band, I suggest you look into them. _


	28. Malchik Gay

_Malchik gay  
Malchik gay, malchik gay  
Malchik gay  
Malchik gay, malchik gay  
Malchik gay  
Malchik gay_

Handsome  
Tender  
Soft  
Why do you look right through me  
thinking  
"No"  
I can't deny my feelings  
Growing strong  
I try to keep believing  
dreaming on  
And every time I see you  
I crave more  
I wanna pull you closer  
closer  
closer  
closer  
but you leave me feeling frozen

Malchik gay  
Malchik gay  
I can be  
all you need  
Won't you please  
stay with me  
Malchik gay  
Malchik gay  
Apologies, might-have-been's  
Malchik gay  
Malchik gay  
can't erase what I feel  
Malchik gay, gay  
Malchik gay

Malchik gay

Choking  
Back emotion  
I try to keep on hoping  
for a way;  
a reason for us both to  
come in  
close  
I long for you to hold me  
like your boyfriend does  
and though my dream is  
slowly fading  
I wanna be the object  
object  
object  
object  
of your passion but it's hopeless

Malchik gay  
Malchik gay  
I can be  
all you need  
Won't you please  
stay with me  
Malchik gay  
Malchik gay  
Apologies, might-have-been's  
Malchik gay  
Malchik gay  
can't erase what I feel  
Malchik gay, gay  
Malchik gay

_**What happened last night…**_

They sat, bleary eyed, in one of the numerous 'date-rooms' on Misa's floor. L blinked his drunken eyes and turned to Light, swaying slightly from his spot on the couch's back. "Why are we up here again, Light-kun?" He slurred. The teen gave him a lopsided smile and clumsily swept his hand through the air.

"Because you can see the whooole room from up here…" He sang slightly. L giggled (something that he would've _never_ had done was it not for the alcohol).

"You're drunk, Light-kun!" He accused, a crooked smile spreading loosely on his mouth.

Light chuckled and swayed on the couch's back. "Ryuuzaki, I'm not a you think drunk I am…wait." They laughed and somehow ended up staring at the ceiling from the floor.

They looked at each other, boyish grins on both of their faces. "We fell." L said; Light smiled at the flushed detective, and gave him a small peck on the lips.

The suspect pulled back an inch, before they both leaned in for a more intimate kiss. Light pulled back after a few moments and looked up at the ceiling. "Sorry, drunken mistake." He said.

The detective shrugged, "'s okay; nothing happened." He replied easily, and snuggled up to the boy.

-

L was honestly having a good time watching the expressions of the task force. Though his head was pounding, he was doing a very good job at hiding his hangover.

He wanted to burst out laughing at the shocked expressions on the entire task force's (and Light's) collective faces.

"W-what?" Light asked finally breaking the heavy silence. L fused him with a wide eyed gaze.

"We were both extremely drunk last night, though it's sad that you don't remember." The detective shrugged and returned to reading over the same paragraph.

A smile was about to break over his thin mouth; Light was sputtering, as was his father (L could finally see the family resemblance!)

"WHY WAS I DRUNK LAST NIGHT!?"

-

-

…_I don't know. O.O_


	29. The Rake Song

__

I had entered into a marriage  
In the summer of my twenty-first year  
And the bells rang for our wedding  
Only now do I remember it clear  
Alright, alright, alright

No more a rake and no more a bachelor  
I was wedded and it whetted my thirst  
Until her womb started spilling out babies  
Only then did I reckon my curse  
Alright, alright, alright  
Alright, alright, alright

First came Isaiah with his crinkled little fingers  
Then came Charlotte and that wretched girl Dawn  
Ugly Myfanwy died on delivery  
Mercifully taking her mother along  
Alright, alright, alright

What can one do when one is a widower  
Shamefully saddled with three little pests?  
All that I wanted was the freedom of a new life  
So my burden I began to divest  
Alright, alright, alright  
Alright, alright, alright

Charlotte I buried after feeding her foxglove  
Dawn was easy, she was drowned in the bath  
Isaiah fought but was easily bested  
Burned his body for incurring my wrath  
Alright, alright, alright

And that's how I came your humble narrator  
To be living so easy and free  
Expect that you think that I should be haunted  
But it never really bothers me  
Alright, alright, alright  
Alright, alright, alright

_-_

His mouth is open an the tiniest trail of drool leaks from the corner. Dark eyes are wide and unseeing as a foot gently nudges a too-skinny side.

A wide, insane grin stretches over Raito--or now--Kira's mouth, and a mirth filled chuckle spills from his rosy lips.

_I've won_, _L._ Kira thinks, pacing around the male's lifeless corpse like a scavenger would.

L watches, transparent from above, as Kira defiles his weak looking body. The once-detective is repulsed at the act of necrophilia; Kira is a hyena, he decided, watching as the man beats his forever still face.

A scavenger preying on the dead.

-

-

_Holy crap, I FULLY suggest you read this whilst listening to the song. It's on the Decembrists'' new album 'The Hazards of Love'. Very creepy stuff. :D_

_Please review. _


	30. Margaret in Captivity

_I have snipped your wingspan  
My precious captive swan  
Here all clipped of kickstand  
Your spirit won't last long_

Don't you lift a finger  
Don't you snap and jaw  
Limber limbs akimbo  
Rest till rubbing raw

Don't hold out for rescue  
None can hear your call  
Till I have wrest and wrecked you  
Behind these fortress walls

-

Spidery fingers wrapped around his own boney hands, stilling his small twitching movements over the sharp metal robot. Near felt the softly puckered scars on the person's fingertips, most caused by handling a knife or lighting a match while doused in gasoline…

The boy shuddered slightly, thinking the person behind him couldn't feel his body's tremors, but the soft chuckle that came from beside his ear told him otherwise. "Good evening, Nate." His visitor, rapist, master said lowly. Near scowled softly, placing the sharp robot that he had once tried to throw in his defense and said nothing.

"No 'good evening, Master' back? Tsk, where are your manners Nate?" One of the spidery hands lifted and began to caress the long, slightly pink scar on Near's smooth cheek. The man pulled Near back so that the boy leaned against his too-skinny chest; Near could feel his abnormally low body temperature and this made him shudder.

"Beyond…" Near murmured, softly angry but trying to show no emotion in his deadpan voice. The boy looked up at his 'Master's' face and saw that it was turned down so it could look at him. The edges of Beyond's crimson eyes tilted upwards as a crooked smile appeared on the man's lips.

"What did I say about that name, Nate?" Near mentally sighed, knowing that he really couldn't win when arguing with a person just _barely_ holding onto their sanity, and fixed his features into a small, cute pout.

"If you get to call me by my real name, why can't I call you by yours…master?" Beyond chuckled lowly in his throat, making Near shiver slightly at the noise.

The chains were never kind to their captives…

-

-

_Oh shut it Near, you know you love it. _

_Geh, I need to update on 'No Refunds', buut…I'm lazy. I'll do it later (nod)_

_This song is from The Decembrists' new album 'The Hazards of Love'…which I'm listening to right now…quite loudly. :D_


	31. Shankill Butchers

_The Shankill Butchers run tonight  
You better shut your windows tight  
They're sharpening their cleavers and their knives  
And taking all their whiskey by the pint_

And everybody knows if you don't  
Mind your mother's words  
A wicked wind will blow  
Your ribbons from your curls  
Everybody moan, everybody shake  
The Shankill Butchers want to catch you awake

They used to be just like me and you  
They used to be sweet little boys  
But something went horribly askew  
Now killing is their only source of joy

And everybody knows if you don't  
Mind your mother's words  
A wicked wind will blow  
Your ribbons from your curls  
Everybody moan, everybody shake  
The Shankill Butchers want to catch you awake

The Shankill Butchers run tonight  
They're waiting until the dead of the night  
They're picking at their fingers with their knives  
And whiping off their cleavers on their thighs

And everybody knows if you don't  
Mind your mother's words  
A wicked wind will blow  
Your ribbons from your curls  
Everybody moan, everybody shake  
The Shankill Butchers want to catch you awake

--

He was a dirty, filthy miscreant, glaring across the room at his long-sworn rival. The teenaged killer mentally went over his plan to have the skinny, dead looking person removed.

A smirk twitched at the corners of his mouth (actually, it was the barest quirking of his lips); there were no miscalculations on his part. Dark gold eyes drifted away from the person he so loathed, to the very thing that helped him kill.

An invaluable tool of destruction; the murderer snickered softly, causing his rival to turn his pit like eyes onto him. The skinny male cocked his head to one side, a delicate eyebrow posed in question.

He didn't say anything, causing the male to shrug a too-thin shoulder. The murderer watched as his rival picked up a silver spoon (and with much dexterity) used the two fingers that kept the utensil posed at his papery white mouth, to scoop a heaping amount of ice cream into his gullet.

A deep frown tugged at the murderer's lip and he turned from the disgusting sight of the skinny male making a glutton out of himself. _No matter._ The teenaged killer thought with a sigh of relief. _That intolerable man will be dead soon. _

_-_

_Yeaaah, this was a 'vocabulary paragraph' I had to write for English class. I got a good grade on it! ^^ Haah, I'm writing this in class. Please review._


	32. Epiphany

__

They all deserve to die.  
Tell you why, Mrs. Lovett, tell you why.  
Because in all of the whole human race  
Mrs. Lovett, there are two kinds of men and only two  
There's the one staying put in his proper place  
And the one with his foot in the other one's face  
Look at me, Mrs Lovett, look at you.

No, we all deserve to die  
Tell you why, Mrs. Lovett, tell you why.  
Because the lives of the wicked should be made brief  
For the rest of us death will be a relief  
We all deserve to die.

_-_

I was never to be caught it seemed. My hands ghosted over the bloody handle of the hammer, but I thought about the action and pulled it away.

I sat beside the ruined body of the twelve year old Mark Waters, and waited a few minuets for my head to stop buzzing. I studied the boy's bloody face and smashed skull; the crimson beads stained the hammer handle, and fell with a plop onto his immobile face.

The motel sheets were rumpled and stained from other peoples' rendezvous; there was a fading sperm stain beside Mark's bruised foot.

I stood and lazily pulled the hammer from his skull. My feet shuffled over the dirty shag carpet and to the bathroom where I kept a large bottle of sulfuric acid.

I placed the dirty hammer into the sink and began to dissolve the wooden handle. After that job was done, I picked up the remaining metal head and placed it carefully beside the body.

I gazed down at 'my work' with a small scowl on my mouth. There wasn't much to clean up; all I needed to do was scrape under his nails, clean out any remaining areas of the body I had touched, and so forth.

With a small pleased smirk, I looked down at the smooth pads of my fingers. I didn't have to wipe for any distinctive fingerprints or toe prints because they had been burned off long ago.

-

-

_I wrote this during Biology. Part two of "These Things", because that's one of my favorites that doesn't center around a coupling. :D_


	33. When You're Evil

__

When the Devil is too busy  
And Death's a bit too much  
They call on me by name you see,  
For my special touch.  
To the Gentlemen I'm Miss Fortune  
To the Ladies I'm Sir Prize  
But call me by any name  
Any way it's all the same

I'm the fly in your soup  
I'm the pebble in your shoe  
I'm the pea beneath your bed  
I'm a bump on every head  
I'm the peel on which you slip  
I'm a pin in every hip  
I'm the thorn in your side  
Makes you wriggle and writhe

And it's so easy when you're evil  
This is the life, you see  
The Devil tips his hat to me  
I do it all because I'm evil  
And I do it all for free  
Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need

While there's children to make sad  
While there's candy to be had  
while there's pockets left to pick  
While there's grannies left to trip down the stairs  
I'll be there, I'll be waiting 'round the corner  
It's a game. I'm glad I'm in it  
'Cause there's one born every minute

And it's so easy when you're evil  
This is the life, you see  
The Devil tips his hat to me  
I do it all because I'm evil  
And I do it all for free  
Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need

I pledge my allegiance, to all things dark  
And I promise on my damned soul  
To do as I am told, Lord Beelzebub  
Has never seen a soldier quite like me  
Not only does his job, but does it happily.

I'm the fear that keeps you awake  
I'm the shadows on the wall  
I'm the monsters they become  
I'm the nightmare in your skull  
I'm a dagger in your back  
An extra turn upon the rack  
I'm the quivering of your heart  
A stabbing pain, a sudden start.

And it's so easy when you're evil  
This is the life, you see  
The Devil tips his hat to me  
I do it all because I'm evil  
And I do it all for free  
Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need  
And I do it all for free  
Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need  
And I do it all for free  
Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need

It gets so lonely being evil  
What I'd do to see a smile  
Even for a little while  
And no one loves you when you're evil  
I'm lying through my teeth!  
Your tears are all the company I need

-

To only want one that looks exactly like you is the highest form of narcissism; you want to touch that person who looks so much like you and have him make you writhe underneath him. It's sick the way you cast him a barely cover lusty gaze, sticky with your want and pathetic _need_.

He merely smirks and stands from his spot at the dinner table. "I'll be in my room." It seem he announces to the table, but it's really directed at you. _I'll be waiting…_was really the underlying message he was trying to send you.

The message is received, and you lower your eyes to the blond boy babbling next to you. I glare at my half-eaten potatoes as I hear your chair scoot across the old wooden floor. "I'm done." You mutter to your caretaker, who nods and doesn't see anything queer about your behavior.

I can't take it anymore, and I shove my plate out of the way. "I'm done as well." I swallow the thick spit in my mouth, and ignore the way my stomach growls. No one seems to notice me leaving and shuffling in the direction of where I know you'll be.

My ears perk at the sound of quick thumps, and hushed growls. A frown dips the corner of my lips, and I move closer to the noises. God, how can you be so _useless_? My hands trace the delicate wall paper as I move closer to the locked door.

I know where you'll be now; you'll be shivering for _more and more_ of his repulsive touch, whimpering for him to go on. He'll smirk in that disgustingly creepy way and comply to your wishes because this is the _only_ way he'll ever best you at anything.

I hear a low moan, and a hiss of discomfort. I know that he's inside you now; I grit my teeth as the cries of pain turn into mewls of pleasure. "O-oh god…" You blaspheme; I can here his self-satisfied chuckle, low and husky with testosterone pumping through his veins.

The head-board bangs against the wall, and the faint smacking of skin against skin meet my sick and jealous ears. The hallway is dark because no one comes down this corridor anymore. They're too scared of him…

I fall asleep with the sound of your lust licking at my eardrums; my body is curled up on itself, and an hour passes until I'm roughly prodded awake. My eyes open blearily, and I mutter something inaudible. My pupils dilate and then widen so that they're accustomed to the dark and I can see crimson glinting down at me.

I gasp, and sit up, trying to move away from him. He leans forward, gripping the front of my shirt. "Little sheep, why are you up so late?" I'm pulled forward, and I gulp. I can smell sex still on his damp skin almost as snowy pale as yours. I feel light-headed and I'm sure that I'm going to retch.

"I-I…" I stammer, trying to let my brilliant mind come up with a reasonable lie. The beginnings of a smirk spread over his lips like melted caramel on an apple.

"You're going to have to come up with something quicker…" He purrs, his crimson eyes half-lidded. I try to back away, but end up clashing with the flowery wall.

He stands back up, spine bent in the way that you do because he's a _copy_, and smirks eerily down at me. "You're such a jealous brat." He says, placing a hand on top of my head and begins to pet the white curls. "You honestly think he could want a _thing_ like _you_?"

I grind my teeth together as tears unwillingly well in my eyes. _It's true…true true true!_ The voice in my head sings, and I bite the inside of my cheek to keep the tears from spilling out. "Y-you're…wrong." I grind out, trying to convince myself more than he.

His lips are at my ear, and I feel the pigmentless edges brush the cartilage. "Do you listen because _you_ want to be the one writhing underneath him? Do you want to call out his name in ecstasy." His voice changes to a breathy high-pitched version of my own. "_'Oh L, take me! Please, like that…oh…!'_" My face flushes and I shake my head fervidly. He chuckles darkly and moves away from my quivering body.

"Please. Your jealousy runs off of you in waves." The moonlight that filters in through a misty window at the end of the hall catches on his smirk. "He'll always be mine."

-

-

_Err…wha?_


	34. Shiny

__

By the bumper cars  
In the pretty twining light  
I may have gone too far  
I may have gone too much, too long  
I'm a dull and witless boy

At the after bars  
Think I was sullied by a dream  
In the killing jar  
You and me at war, at arms  
All falling in embrace

Tell me why you lied  
And what it is you do to keep your eyes all shiny

A tawny gypsy girl  
Sleeping blanketed by stars  
Beneath the tilt-a-whirl  
Where we were coyly caught alone  
All fumbling with your blouse

Tell me why you lied  
And what it is you do to keep your eyes all shiny

And in the rollercoaster din  
By the parachutes in saddle shoes  
You break your shins  
But I have never seen two eyes so shiny

And the sullen beery swine  
Who try to tangle you  
In sullen beery balls of twine  
Have they ever seen two eyes so shiny?

Boys in denim vests  
Smoking cigarettes between  
The bootblack fingertips  
Sweetly tipsy by the half light  
The light and the half light

Tell me why you lied  
And what it is you do to keep your eyes all shiny

_**-**_

When their eyes would meet, he would merely frown and resume whatever he was doing.

It wasn't like they would see each other for the rest of year.

The raven haired boy always came once a year with the circus run by queer looking people dressed head-to-toe in blinding sequins. He looked like a frog amongst royalty, but he was the only one who really captured Light's attention.

The Yagami boy had gone every year to the circus with his family, and when he was twelve, he had first met the raven haired boy.

"_What are you doing?_" He remembered asking the crouching child of eleven who was eating more than the normal amount of cotton candy one should consume. Large black rimmed, onyx-grey eyes blinked up at the prim and proper looking boy; a thin thumb was shoved partway between the strange boy's mouth, and Light remembered grimacing.

"_I'm eating."_ Light left in a huff of frustration when he couldn't get anymore information out of the raven haired nuisance.

Their exchanges had gone on for five more years; they always met in the same spot Light had found him that summer: eating cotton candy like it was going out of style.

They had their petty rows, and sometimes good laughs, but Light knew that it would only last for however long the boy was in town. Once, when he was fifteen and the boy fourteen, he had asked what his name was. The boy didn't reply, but merely shoveled more of the spun sugar into his mouth. _"Ryuuzaki._" He muttered from behind the sweet.

The nights that they were together were always filled with jabbing remarks and witty banter. Light found that he craved this 'Ryuuzaki's' presence more often, and sometimes he dreaded when the boy had to leave.

Light clenched his hands around the grey steering wheel of the family car, trying to block out Sayu and her friends' loud giggles. They would meet, like always, and Light would think nothing of his friend's leaving.

The sometimes eerie lights of the not-so-safe circus rides winked at the seventeen year-old as he pulled the black car onto a make-shift gravel parking lot. The teenaged girls in the back babbled even more, and jumped in excitement. Light told them to leave their cell phones on, and he would call Sayu when they needed to leave. He flashed his sister's friends a charming smile, which made them blush and nod dreamily.

They piled out of the car, running to the glinting circus. Light sighed and leaned against the car, running a hand through his auburn colored hair. His hand returned to his side, and he eyed the park grounds. The question of _Would he be here?_ rang in Light's head like a gong; the seven teen year old kicked off from the car and began walking toward the circus gates.

He shoved past people who were chasing their children; people bumped him and apologized in a breathless hurried way, but he didn't pay them any mind.

Light's feet seemed to know the way toward the cotton candy booth; his eyes scanned the picnic tables for the familiar hunched back of his friend. The young man's gaze was caught by a group of seemingly drunken men; Light' eyes widened and he felt his heart begin to thud in his chest.

"C'mon, it'll just be for one night." The boy heard one of the drunken men slur. The others around chuckled and seemed to make the grouping tighter by moving inward.

"Leave me be, Aaron; I have told you countless times that you disgust me." A seemingly calm voice floated from the center of the crowd, and Light felt his breathing catch in his throat.

One man laughed throatily and slapped another man (one who Light could only assume was 'Aaron') on the back. "Ooh, told you di'n't 'e?" Light's feet were rooted to the ground; he watched as Aaron cocked back a fist and punched the man.

The man turned back to the person in the middle of the circle. "You tease; I've seen the way you look at me, and I know you _want_ it." The group erupted in a loud fit of laughter; Light watched as Aaron reached for the person in the middle, but fell backward clutching his private regions.

The other's fell over, clutching their heads or groins, groaning in pain. Light lifted his eyes from the fallen men to the person they had been harassing.

"Ryuuzaki?" Light asked, walking closer, ignoring the groaning men at his feet. Wide, onyx-grey eyes never left his.

"…Light?" They had truly grown up; Light into a handsome young man and Ryuuzaki into a somewhat effeminate looking male. Light stopped in front of his friend and looked down at the hunched over raven haired sixteen year old.

The emotions that had been building in Light for the past five years seemed to collect heavily in his heart; the confusion, frustration, attraction, embarrassment, they all seemed to swirl in his head. "Are you alright?" Light asked, fingers twitching because he wanted to _touch_ the skinny male.

Ryuuzaki lowered his wide eyes to the men on the ground, and a small devious smile quirked the edges of his lips. "Never better."

He looked back up at the seventeen year old, shifting his slight weight from one foot to the other, and fiddled with the edge of his white shirt. "Light I-I don't know how to say this…"

Light sucked in a small amount of air, and lifted his hands to cup the boy's narrow face. Ryuuzaki blinked up at him, and a small gasp left his mouth when Light kissed him.

_-_

_-_

_Ner, a completely random drabble. I was bored and listening to the Decemberists. Aww, L's a 'tawny gypsy girl' and Light's a 'dull and witless boy'. ^^ Please review. _


	35. The Chapter without a song

_-_

The sound of the coffee pot puffing away was to his right; his hands worked the semi-frozen plastic of the hot-dog package as a soft sigh bubbled up from his lungs. Dark eyes glanced at the digital clock of the stove, and he placed each individual meat stick into the boiling water.

One hand came to rest on his queerly stretched abdomen, and another sigh racked the twenty-five year olds body.

People who knew him, or at least his preferred diet of nothing but sweets, would think it quite strange for him to be eating hot-dogs and coffee at three in the morning. His early hours (or late, however you wanted to look at it) wouldn't have surprised anyone who knew the insomniac, but the fact of his being pregnant would have shocked the people he knew and 'trusted'.

A deep scowl marred the face of the greatest detective as he moved to throw away the hot-dog plastic. _Damn shinigami…_L thought to himself as his bare feet padded over the linoleum.

He glanced at the closed door that lead to the master bedroom; he knew Raito would be in there, sleeping peacefully away, not worrying about anyone but himself. L frowned again, turning his gaze back to the black pot of boiling water. They had only slept together once, but with the medaling of the bone shinigami had left him with a nine-month present.

L unconsciously placed his hand back on his abdomen, drumming his fingertips on the taunt skin. Though, it wasn't like he wanted to get rid of the child growing rapidly inside of him. Sure, he had been freaked out, and slightly worried what Raito would have thought (joining the ever growing numbers of a teenaged father), but he had reacted pleasantly well.

The detective placed two hot-dogs on a plate and smothered them in honey; he took a savage bite out of one and winced at the strange taste. Though, the cravings always could be a bit better.

-

_I really have no clue where this came from. Inspiration for a silly little drabble popped into my head when I was making both coffee and hot-dogs (though not at three in the morning.)_

_I've grown to like mpreg (though it's still really weird; hey this is fandom, not reality!) Haah, anyway, review. _


	36. Callous

__

You cried and you cried and you cried wolf  
So it took me a minute to understand  
That you really were hurt bad  
That day you deeply cut your hand  
And then that look that you gave me  
Sent me rushing through guilt's door  
I'd already started to feel callous  
Like I really should care more

It was my work that kept me upright  
So you called it a crutch  
While I drifted off  
Into dreams of such and such  
And by the time we'd come full circle  
We knew exactly what to do  
Just keep looking at the triangle  
Instead of what it's pointing to

But you can't will yourself happy  
You can't will your cunt wet  
You can't keep standing at the station  
Pretending you're being met  
You can't wear a sign that says 'yours'  
When that ain't what you get

It flows and flows away from me  
My love is a stream  
Your love is a vaudeville show  
So charming and obscene  
We both had our moments  
We both had our fun  
And then I hated to prove 'em all right  
All those who said I'd run

But you can't will yourself happy  
You can't will your cunt wet  
You can't keep standing at the station  
Pretending you're being met  
You can't keep wearing a sign that says 'yours'

_-_

"Then leave!" His face is ashen in the heat of your rage. You can see crystal-like tears forming at the corners of his eyes, and that gives you bitter satisfaction. He bites his lip in the way you find annoyingly cute, and he lifts curious fingertips to the blooming bruise on his left cheek.

"B-but…" He stammers; the sound of flesh connecting with flesh cracks through the apartment complex-hallway.

"Shut _up_!" You scream, feeling your own angry and confused tears welling in your eyes. "I don't ever want to hear you!"

You can see his legs beginning to shake, and this deflates some of your anger. Sobs are beginning to wrack his frame, and he crumbles in on himself. "I-I didn't mean t-to…!" He wails over and over.

You resist the urge to poke and prod some more at his obvious depression, and quell the shaking in your fists as you drop to the ground beside. Your arms wrap around him and you pull him close; your eyes catch the bruises and old scars on his arms. His clings to your shirt, staining the once pure white fabric. "W-why…?"

Your mouth is at his ear, and you whisper the words he knows by heart. "Raito-kun, I hit you because I love you…"

-

-

_What. The. Hell. __**L**_x_Light? As in, L AS THE SEME? Wow…anyway…right. (Don't get me wrong, I still prefer Light as the seme -nod-)_

_I wanted to do a homage to a one-shot that I read where L was the abusive 'boyfriend'. It was good, so the plot belongs to her or him. -nod-_


	37. White Rabbit

__

One pill makes you larger

And one pill makes you small

And the ones that mother gives you

Don't do anything at all

Go ask Alice

When she's ten feet tall

And if you go chasing rabbits

And you know you're going to fall

Tell 'em a hookah smoking caterpillar

Has given you the call

Call Alice

When she was just small

When men on the chessboard

Get up and tell you where to go

And you've just had some kind of mushroom

And your mind is moving slow

Go ask Alice

I think she'll know

When logic and proportion

Have fallen sloppy dead

And the White Knight is talking backwards

And the Red Queen's "off with her head!"

Remember what the dormouse said;

"Feed YOUR HEAD

_One pill makes you larger_

_And one pill makes you small_

_And the ones that mother gives you_

_Don't do anything at all_

_Go ask Alice_

_When she's ten feet tall_

_And if you go chasing rabbits_

_And you know you're going to fall_

_Tell 'em a hookah smoking caterpillar_

_Has given you the call_

_Call Alice_

_When she was just small_

_When men on the chessboard_

_Get up and tell you where to go_

_And you've just had some kind of mushroom_

_And your mind is moving slow_

_Go ask Alice_

_I think she'll know_

_When logic and proportion_

_Have fallen sloppy dead_

_And the White Knight is talking backwards_

_And the Red Queen's "off with her head!"_

_Remember what the dormouse said;_

_"Feed YOUR HEAD _

_ -_

His eyes seemed to swim in his head; it felt as if he were flying over the tree tops that were made of colorful lollypops. A bubbly giggle floated out from behind his normally unsmiling mouth. Everything was wonderful!

Colors exploded everywhere, and the laughing people played ring-around-the-rosy. Their childish laughter joined his and he watched as their grins grew and stretched over their faces.

The LSD rainbows poured from his eyes, and he laid his head back on the cotton candy grass. A few stray giggles bubbled out of his mouth.

He felt hands on his body, but nothing hurt because everything was so wonderful!

-

_I don't know why L's on LSD…but I like it. :D _

_Please review!_


	38. The Judas Cradle

_Hanging high above the Inquisitors gathered  
below ropes and shackles twitch in anicipation  
placed upon the throne designed not for rules  
but the sinful wretch  
a belt fastened around the waist hoisted over the  
cradle and lowered spike fixed under the spine  
ropes attached to the feet rocked back and forth  
questioned on faith weights shackled to the limbs  
intense interrogation,spike set deep within the  
flesh reducing the spine to pulp immense pain  
fills the body with every tremor of the ropes  
raised once again.._

_-_

Raito-kun…in my last few minuets (or is it seconds? I can't tell any longer) I can see how truly deceitful you were. I am held in my Judas' arms, and I smile up at your grinning face, and notice the pretty colour of your eyes. They glow scarlet in the blinking crimson light, and I want to lift a hand to touch your swimming face, but I find that I don't have the strength.

Oh my Judas, I watched you kill thousands because you liked the way the uniform fit you; hiding the demons of greed, lust, power and envy behind a shining mask of a savior.

My hands are shaking as I feel my mind begin to slip into madness, and I feel the hot tears building under my rolling eyeballs. Your face is falling, and the movements are so slight that I barely catch it.

I'm falling now; my chest feels ready to burst from the lack of oxygen. Your mouth is square, and I can see your perfect row of teeth from under your plush mouth. "H-hey…Ryuuzaki, this isn't funny." You whimper, and I want to answer back.

I hear your scream, perfect in pitch and filled with false grief. "RYUUZAKI!?" I look down at your crumpled form and glance at the task force as they come running.

-

_Hm, I'm bored...Please review_


	39. Cry Me a River

_Now you say you love me,  
You cried the whole night through.  
Well you can cry me a river,  
Cry me a river,  
I cried a river over you._

Now you say your sorry,  
For bein' so untrue.  
Well you can cry me a river,  
Cry me a river,  
I cried a river over you.

You drove me, nearly drove me,  
Out of my head;  
While you never shed a tear.

Remember, I remember,  
All that you said;  
You told me love was too plebian,  
Told me you were through with me-

And Now you say you love me,  
Well, just to prove you do, cry me a river,  
Cry me a river,

I cried a river over you

-

"I don't want you to leave." My hands still over the buttons to my shirt, and I turn my head to the right to look at him. His knees are drawn up to his bare chest, the white of the sheet contrasting with his pale skin riddled with love bites.

"I have to." I reply, letting my fingers loop the buttons through the holes, "My dad will start to suspect something…" I watch as his skinny fingers thread through mine as he hugs me loosely; he presses his forehead in between my shoulder blades, and I can feel the wrinkling of his brow as he frowns.

"Why can't you just forget about him?" He whispers, and tilts his head up so that his chin digs into my spine. I hiss slightly in pain, and turn fully to face him. I give him a frown, but then sigh at the forlorn expression he wears.

"L…you know I _can't_ do that."

"I would pay for your school." He says, gazing into my eyes.

"It's not just that."

"You're father's connections aren't that important." I breathe loudly through my nose, and stand from the bed.

"I have to do this…at least for another year." My eyes scan the floor looking for anything I might of missed, trying not to meet his lowered gaze. I watch as the edge of the sheet moves, and the raven haired detective is standing in front of me.

"We've been together for two years, and you keep saying that." L's white hands grope for my own, and he forces me to look at him. "You're always going to say that, no matter how much I beg you to forget about him." I blink and he lets go of my hands to curl up on the bed. He opens his mouth once, snaps it closed, and then opens it again. "Raito-kun…I can't keep doing this if you keep ignoring me…"

-

-

_BURN! L broke up with Raito…haa…anyway, this song isn't by J.T but actually it's Julie London's version. :D Oooh! I got my nose pierced yesterday; it looks nice. :D_

_Please review! _


	40. Perfect Enemy

_Why should I welcome  
Your domination  
Why should I listen  
To explanations_

I'm not pretending  
To make it simple  
Try to be something  
Experimental

You don't turn me off  
I will never fail  
Things I loved before,  
Are not for sale  
Keep yourself away  
Far away from me  
I forever stay  
Your perfect enemy

No longer waiting  
Remove illusions  
No more complaining  
Forget confusion

No more compassion  
Not sentimental  
I am now something  
Experimental

You don't turn me off  
I will never fail  
Things I loved before,  
Are NOW for sale  
Keep yourself away  
Far away from me  
I forever stay  
Your perfect enemy

You don't turn me off  
I will never fail  
Things I loved before,  
Are NOW for sale  
Keep yourself away  
Far away from me  
I forever stay  
Your perfect enemy

You don't turn me off  
I will never fail  
Things I loved before,  
Are NOW for sale  
Keep yourself away  
Far away from me  
I forever stay  
Your perfect enemy

-

Near watched the ridiculous SPK members flit around like a bunch of chickens with their heads cut off. His tiny fingers danced over the pitted, black and white face of a domino. He counted the tiny dots slowly in his head, and then counted backward. 'One…two…three…four…five…five…four…three…two…one.' He had just announced that they would be moving from Los Angeles to Tokyo that day because of the risk of a Kira supporter attack; Linder had yelled at him that it was unnecessary, but he had gave her a pointed look that very clearly said 'Shut. Up.'

The small seventeen year old threw the tiny square of plastic to the toy-riddled carpet, and stood slowly. His stocking clad feet shuffled gracefully over fallen robots, dominos and other various thing he had to state his boredom. His small hands primly picked up one of the squishy, rubber finger puppets that was set precariously over a large map that one would normally see in a toddler's room. He picked up the small 'Near' finger puppet that was currently sitting on the state California, right beside the puppets of Mello and Matt; his ice-blue eyes studied the miniature before he set the puppet on the country of Japan right beside the masked Kira puppet.

The late-L's case notes sat beside the albino; he slid a grey eye to the top file that contained all of the last L's suspects. It was only filled with one paper. Yagami Raito. Near thought, holding up the sheet of paper to exam; the male's startling beauty smirked up at the albino.

Deep honey eyes danced with a wicked brilliance stared at the small seventeen year old from the recent photograph. Near's fingers tightened unconsciously on the creamy white paper, and a small half-smile lifted his colorless lips.

-

-

_Haa, T.a.T.u!_


	41. Lovefool

_Dear, I fear we're facing a problem  
you love me no longer, I know  
and maybe there is nothing  
that I can do to make you do  
Mama tells me I shouldn't bother  
that I ought to stick to another man  
a man that surely deserves me  
but I think you do!_

_-_

"Why is it bothering me so badly!?" Mello growled at his red-headed friend. Matt stubbed out his cigarette on the heel of his boot, and looked over at the couple whom Mello was brooding about.

He scrutinized the way L's dark eyes went wide and a fine blush powdered the bridge of his nose after Raito had whispered something to him. Matt snorted and turned to his glaring blond friend. "It's because he's less than 90% body fat and he's shagging your ex-boyfriend."

-

_Lately I have desperately pondered,  
spent my nights awake and I wonder  
what I could do have done in another way  
to make you stay  
Reason will not lead to solution  
I will end up lost in confusion  
I don't care if you really care  
as long as you don't go_

_-_

_-_

…_MelloxL? Er…yeah…pretty much based off the 'Wedding Date'...heh_


	42. Psychobabble

_How did you get this number?  
I can't get my head 'round you  
Of course you're not coming over  
Snap out of it  
You're not making any sense_

You couldn't be more wrong, darling  
I never gave out these signs  
You misunderstand all meaning  
Snap out of it  
I'm not falling for this one

If love is surrender  
Then whose war is it anyway?

**--**

The canvas of the straight jacket rubbed raw against his skin as he shifted his body. His hair was getting long; he blew a strand of the auburn hair out of his eyes and licked his dry lips.

He heard the heavy thuds of the doctors' worn shoes walk past his tightly sealed door; he didn't bother screaming for water because he knew they'd only refuse his request.

The generators that kept the overly bright lights on in his room sputtered to a stop, causing the lights to spontaneously turn off. He gulped because the voices were always the worst at night.

They would always start as a whisper, but as the night progressed, they grew to high pitched screaming that would wrack his disturbed brain around in his skull.

He had come to the asylum when he was fifteen after he had been found covered in his murdered family's blood. '_They told me to do it._' He said to the frowning police off ricers. One officer that had come to dinner sometimes, gritted his teeth and forced himself to look at the mutilated bodies of his former chief, his wife and their young daughter.

'_W-who?_'

The boy of fifteen became interested in a fly that had landed on the metal table-top. He began to pick at a purplish scab that had crusted on his hand. '_The…the demons that follow me._'

The court had found him insane, but guilty; they knew that they couldn't slap him into a federal prison because of his insanity and also because he was a minor.

His eyes snapped open as he heard bare feet slowly shuffling over padded flooring. A yellow flashlight flickered on which just slightly revealed a dark silhouette. "…are you going to kill me?" He asked, leaning his head against the padded wall, leaving his throat bared.

The silhouette moved closer until cool breath fanned his face, and a boney hand rested on his thigh. "No." He watched as the figure moved, and then the blemish-free skin of an apple was pressed against his chapped lips. "Can I tell you a story?"

-

_Make no sudden movements  
And no one will get hurt  
You're making me nervous  
If you know what's good for me  
Why would I be leaving you?_

Now, I've had it up to here  
Don't ever try that again  
Why are you so quiet so suddenly?  
Go on, have it  
You're just dying to try me

-

_This is a…sequel(?) to 'My mother was…' I actually wrote this around March in Geometry. Yosh! Tomorrow (later today actually; it's 12:47 now) I'm leaving for Sioux City. I'm excited :D_


	43. Tear You Apart

_Got a big plan, this mindset maybe its right  
At the right place and right time, maybe tonight  
And the whisper or handshake sending a sign  
Wanna make out and kiss hard, wait nevermind_

Late night, and passing, mention it flipped her  
Best friend, who knows saying maybe it slipped  
But the slip turns to terror and a crush to light  
When she walked in, he throws up, believe its the fright

Its cute in a way, till you cannot speak  
And you leave to have a cigarette, your knees get weak  
An escape is just a nod and a casual wave  
Obsessed about it, heavy for the next two days

It's only just a crush, it'll go away  
It's just like all the others it'll go away  
Or maybe this is danger and you just don't know  
You pray it all away but it continues to grow

-

-

I watched the vapory grey smoke tumble from those wonderfully sinful lips, causing a soft blush to overtake my normally white face. His goggles hung around his neck, and after a momentary pause, dark green eyes slid over to meet my own gaze.

"Yeah, Near?" Matt asked lowly, not acting the least bit surprised at having been caught smoking inside.

I felt my face heat up slightly at the look I had received from the gamer, but I covered my embarrassment by returning his stare. I fiddled with a bit of my curly hair; "Where's Mello? Roger asked me to get him."

Matt shrugged, stubbing out his burning cigarette on the abused window sill. "I dunno; he up and left an hour ago..."

"Did he say where he was going?"

"Nope."

I watched as Matt lazily swung a leg off the messed sheets of the bed where it was met with the other leg. I stayed rooted to my spot, a warm blush becoming even more evident on my face as the gamer walked closer to me.

I dropped the stare that I had been holding, and decided to look _anywhere_ but Matt's dangerous, dark green gaze. I felt very vulnerable under that intense look, trapped by twin pools of emerald; when first coming into this room, I knew that I was in danger, whether it be from Mello's petty rage, or Matt's barely covered lusty stares.

I was in a den of sex and scandal, the lions' den if you will, and I was most likely allowing myself to become prey to a very hungry lion. But...I didn't care.

Yes, I knew that Matt watched me whenever he thought I wasn't going to notice; I would feel his plastic covered gaze rake hotly down my body until I felt that I was going to burst into flames.

Gloveless hands slid over my gently sloped shoulders; I felt strong, smooth fingertips begin to caress the sids of my throat, and they slid under the collar of my loose button-up. "Near..." Matt breathed, as if in awe that this was actually happening. "Look at me."

I dragged my eyes from the window with its shades drawn and cracked open halfway, allowing the sun to slice through the semi-dark room like knives. I turned my face up to his own, blushing at his too-close proximity.

A small smirk worked its way onto Matt's lips; he could feel my body trembling slightly from his touch. I swallowed the thick spit that had decided to become sticky in my mouth; I lowered my eyes to his shirt collar. "W-what are you doing?" Matt snickered softly at my nervous stutter, and moved closer (_Is that even possible?_ my brain asked).

His lips moved against my ear, causing a soft, shaky moan to bubble from my mouth. "I thought someone as intelligent as you would be able to figure that out." A hand moved from my shoulder to ghost down over my back, only to stop at the waist-band of my pajama pants.

I felt Matt grin, and a finger hooked under the white, cotton fabric and slid under the light-weight material. I gasped at the contact; Matt snickered again at my reaction, sliding his fingers over the flesh of my bum. "M-Matt!?" I was shocked at how forward he was being; I felt my knees beginning to grow weak, and then an arm wrapped around my slender waist.

"Near," Matt murmured into my ear, "Let me do this just once, 'kay?" He pulled back, looking me directly in the eyes; I gulped, but nodded slowly.

Our sex was hurried (in case Mello decided to return early from where ever he was). The bed was messy, and from my position, I could see past evidence of sexual happenings. Knowing that Matt had most likely slept with Mello didn't make me angry because there was nothing to be angry about.

When our tongues battled for some kind of dominance (although Matt had the upper hand) I could taste nicotine on his breath, and it was highly addictive.

Matt told me that he loved me; he said this when he was nearing his orgasm, and I felt like crying because I knew that I didn't feel the same.

After the hurried copulation, we laid on the bed, basking in the after-glow of post-orgasmic bliss. Matt lazily played with my hair, not bothering to pull out. "I have to leave." I said, staring at the high vaulted ceiling.

I felt him nod, and the slick sound of him pulling out made me cringe slightly.

I stepped outside of the room, closing the door quietly behind me. My fingers adjusted my shirt before I heard a gruff voice ask, "Why the hell are you here?"

I turned and stared blankly as Mello chewed aggressively on his chocolate bar. "I was talking to Matt." I said dully.

Mello opened his mouth to retort, but his nose scrunched up and instead he said: "Jesus! You smell like sex!"

I felt a tiny smirk appear on my lips, and I stepped around Mello; I began to walk down the hall but I paused and looked over my shoulder. "Matt and I did it on your bed; he told me he loved me." I waited until the impact hit, watching as Mello's mouth dropped open. "Roger also wanted to speak to you, Mello."  
-

_I want to hold you close  
Skin pressed against me tight  
Lie still, and close your eyes girl  
So lovely, it feels so right_

I want to hold you close  
Soft breasts, beating heart  
As I whisper in your ear

I want to fucking tear you apart

Then he walked up and told her, thinking that he'd passed  
And they talked and looked away a lot, doing the dance  
Her hand brushed up against his, she left it there  
Told him how she felt and then they locked in a stare

They took a step back, thought about it, what should they do  
Cause theres always repercussions when you're dating in school  
But their lips met, and reservations started to pass  
Whether this was just an evening or a thing that would last

Either way he wanted her and this was bad  
He wanted to do things to her it was making him crazy  
Now a little crush turned into a like  
And now he wants to grab her by the hair and tell her...

_-_

_-_

_Haha, please review :D _


	44. Angel Angel Down We Go Together

_Angel, angel  
Dont take your life tonight  
I know they take  
And that they take in turn  
And they give you nothing real  
For yourself in return_

But when theyve used you  
And theyve broken you  
And theyve wasted all your money  
And cast your shell aside

And when theyve bought you  
And theyve sold you  
And theyve billed you for the pleasure  
And theyve made your parents cry  
I will be here  
Oh, believe me  
I will be here  
...believe me

Angel, dont take your life  
Some people have got no pride  
They do not understand  
The urgency of life  
But I love you more than life

-

-

Her chest felt weighted down and the heavy make up around her wide, blue eyes was slightly smudged from the tears that threatened to leak out. Her small hands clenched at the sides of her black dress as she let her gaze fall over the city. A small, sad smile graced her scarlet covered mouth because she knew that she was their unknown fallen queen.

Misa let a soft sob escape her lips when she though back to that phone call; Matsuda's normally peppy voice was monotone and grey sounding when he told her of Light's confession and death. The heavy plastic phone fell to the tiled floor with a loud clatter and she covered her mouth with a finely manicured hand, stifling a pained scream.

Her high-heeled boots were planted firmly on the edge of the tall, sky-scraper. She let a frustrated howl leave her tiny body; Light _lied_ to her!

He _said_ that he would love her till he died, but his constant promises of Valentine mornings had grown to a tired babble just to keep her happy. Yes, Misa knew that her fallen king, her Light had been unfaithful during their relationship; he had slept with _Takada_ and _L_ to gain their trust, but Misa always told herself he was only doing that to rid the way for them. For _their_ happiness.

The girl of twenty-eight let one foot dangle over the edge of the building, a dangerous position for anyone if a strong wind came, and stopped. Her hands balled into fists and she took her foot back, placing it down on the concrete slab.

She cocked her head to one side, her blonde hair draped over her black and white covered shoulders; a small grin settled on her mouth as she stepped back over the rail separating the roof end ledge.

She would think for herself.

-

-

_I'd like to think that Misa didn't kill herself...even if it was pretty apparent that she did. _


	45. Me vs You

_Me: Starving Wolverine  
You: Baby covered in Pork Chops  
Me. Pigeon with explosive diarrhea  
You: Statue under me and my friends_

__

Me vs. You, what you gonna do?

Me. Hillbilly  
You: My teeth  
and I like sweets  
Me: Mexican sprinting champion with cousin in north Texas with job oppurtunity for me  
you: Border

Me: The SAT's  
You: High School Football Player  
Me: Gravity  
You: Old lady's tits  
Me: Horney Teenage boy  
You: Sock

Me: Police  
You: campus Police  
Me: feather  
You: Ticklish man sitting on rocking chair at edge of cliff

Me vs. You, what you gonna do?

Me: Angry Rapper  
You: English Language

_Me vs. You, what you gonna do?_

_-_

Their constant, everyday battles against each other could always verge on the ridiculous. If Light finished a sandwich first, L would be the first to suggest that he couldn't eat as much _he_ could, causing Light to challenge him to an eating competition...Osaka was never the same after those two got done with it.

Today was no exception to the two's 'rivalry'.

Misa sighed as she watched the two geniuses playing tennis with unbridled passion; the looks of determination on both of their faces made the girl roll her pretty blue eyes at how _childish_ they both were. A small, almost devious smirk lifted her crimson lips when L dipped low to try and smack the fuzzy ball over the net, only to fail by a few _inches_. She could practically hear his soft, disappointed sigh at having lost.

Light gave a loud laugh of victory, straightening his back and wiping the sweat from his brow. "I win Ryuuzaki," A large, feline smirk spread over the brunet's lips. "You know what that means, right?"

L frowned, popping his wrist and groaning softly. "Unfortunately."

Misa laughed in her head, and bounced up to skip toward the two men to tell them that she was hungry. Yes, L's ass would be hurting tomorrow.

-

-

_An update to tell the few that care that I haven't died. (face palm) I NEED to update on 'No Refunds' ASAP, but school is starting so I'm waiting a little bit...crappy excuse. DEMETRI MARTIN :D_

_Please review!_


	46. Cigarettes and Chocolate Milk

_cigarettes and chocolate milk  
these are just a couple of my cravings  
everything it seems i like's a little bit stronger  
a little bit thicker  
a little bit harmful for me_

__

if i should buy jellybeans  
have to eat them all in just one sitting  
everything it seems i like's a little bit sweeter  
a little bit fatter  
a little bit harmful for me

and then there's those other things  
which for several reasons we won't mention  
everything about them is a little bit stranger  
a little bit harder  
a little bit deadly

it isn't very smart  
tends to make one part so broken-hearted

sitting here remembering me  
always been a shoe made for the city  
go ahead, accuse me of just singing about places  
with scrappy boys faces  
have general run of the town  
playing with prodigal songs  
takes a lot of sentimental valiums  
can't expect the world to be your raggedy andy  
while running on empty  
you little old doll with a frown

you got to keep in the game  
maintaining mystique while facing forward  
i suggest a reading of 'a lesson in tightropes'  
or 'surfing your high hopes' or 'adios kansas'

it isn't very smart  
tends to make one part so broken-hearted

_still there's not a show on my back  
holes or a friendly intervention  
i'm just a little bit heiress, a little bit irish  
a little bit tower of pisa whenever i see you  
so please be kind if i'm a mess  
cigarettes and chocolate milk_

_-_

Near liked their times together, just the three of them. Mello and he sometimes played chess (which Mello _promised_ Near he would beat him at), and Matt would lounge, upside-down on a plush arm chair next to the two of them. Sometimes, they would all three go out to the town of Winchester and spend oodles of money in the toy shops, and candy shops. '_This town has nothing! I have to _London_ to get _anything_!_' Matt would complain good naturally, waving his arms. Mello would shove him, rolling his eyes and giving the red-head a lollypop; Near would crack a tiny smile and play with whatever new toy the two had bought him.

The night that the two top students found out that L had died, they were both frozen with shock.

Near's expression never changed, but Mello could see that the youngest out of the three of them wanted to curl up in a ball and cry. Mello turned to Roger, giving the old man his 'I hate Near because he's number one' act, before storming out of the office to do his own private mourning.

Roger turned to the young child, a small frown dancing on his lips. "Near...you have no objections to working with Mello?"

Near stood, fingering a small white curl that wound around his ear. He needed a hair cut soon..."No, I feel that I would work well with Mello...and Matt if that would be possible." The boy of thirteen turned on his socked foot, clenching his Transformers figure.

He could hear Mello and Matt arguing in their shared room when he walked up to the closed door. Mello's voice was shrill and loud, whereas Matt's was calm with a slight edge of anger to it. "I fucking _am_ going!" Mello yelled, and there was the sound of his wardrobe doors being roughly pulled open.

Matt sighed, and Near could imagine the smoke from a cigarette tumbling out of his mouth. "Mello, _why_? You know very well that L wouldn't want you to...and what about Near?"

"FUCK NEAR!" There was the sound of a suitcase being thrown down onto the floor. Near's hand recoiled from knocking on the door; the boy's grey eyes were wide and the feeling of hurt curled itself into his heart. "J-just f-fuck this place, a-and fuck **L**..." Near could tell that Mello had his hands over his face, and he could almost see Matt hugging his best friend.

Near curled his fingers into a loose fist, bringing his hand back to his side. A soundless sigh left the albino's lips, and he placed the small six inch action figure on the ground beside the door. The boy stared at the figurine for a moment before he turned on his heel.

-

-

_An indication of MxMxN? Yes. 'Cigarettes and Chocolate Milk' is PERFECT for those three, don't you think? Please review._


	47. She Will Always be a Broken Girl

_She buys a new dress for the party  
She always looks good in red  
Turns around in front of the mirror  
And disappears inside of her head  
She wonders if he'll even remember  
She asked him in a casual way  
Just in case he didn't want to go with her  
In that event she knew just what she would say  
She thought of maybe asking a girlfriend  
Even though she only has one or two  
She's always done much better with boys anyway  
So who needs girlfriends?  
Pacing nervous cross the floor of her bedroom  
Gripping tight the phone in her hand  
Biting back the rush of emotions  
And dreaming of just having a man_

__

It's a long walk  
And the music is loud  
She sees an old friend  
As she walks through the crowd  
Puts on her best smile  
But underneath it she's a broken girl  
But it's a long walk  
And the music is loud  
She sees an old friend  
As she walks through the crowd  
Puts on her best smile  
But she will always be a broken girl

She struggles with an awful decision  
Stay at home – or walk in alone  
Her mother does her best to console her  
Her father doesn't know what to say  
Puts on her makeup, puts on the new dress  
Holds her head high then gets in the car  
Tells herself that no one will notice  
Assuming she can make it that far  
On the way she imagines reactions  
Cupped hands whispering into ears  
Secretly hoping that he'll be there watching  
And she's also hoping he won't  
Walking tentative alone up the driveway  
Sees some people smoking off to the side  
She stops and waits until they go back in  
Crosses her fingers and follows behind

He'll never get you

_He will never understand  
He'll never get you  
You can find a better man_

_-_

Her fingers picked up the blush; she smoothed it over her cheeks, smiling softly at herself in the mirror. No one noticed her outings, they were all caught up in the splendor of her big brother.

She pulled on a red dress, smoothing out any wrinkles that may have or may not have appeared. The youngest Yagami eyed herself in the body length mirror, pulling a strand of dark brown hair behind an ear. She sighed, grabbing a coat. "I'm going out on a date, 'kay mom?" She called through the house, ignoring her mother's call of 'have fun'. The door clicked behind her, letting the feeling of complete loneliness settle in her stomach.

A small smile came to her dolled up lips as she watched the snow coming down in delicate flakes. At least something would be beautiful tonight.

A dark car pulled up slowly, filled with smoke and laughing men. The horn honked once, a sharp and loud. One window rolled down, letting smoke spill out into the air. She could see the smirking face of her pimp met the young woman's gaze. "Get in." He ordered her, eyeing her body up and down, making her feel even more dirty than before.

She didn't need this for the money, for her family was pretty well off, nor did she do it because she felt like _this_ was the only way she'd ever get a man. She did it because no one would notice.

-

-

_...(cries) I'm sorry Sayu! _

_She Wants Revenge's song 'She will always be a broken girl' could either point to Misa, or it could point to this situation...I don't know. Anyway, this is before Sayu's kidnapping, and...stuff...yeah. Please review :D_


	48. You Know I'm No Good

_Meet you downstairs in the bar and hurt  
Your rolled up sleeves and your skull t-shirt  
You say what did you do it with him today?  
And sniffed me out like I was Tanqueray_

__

Cause you're my fella, my guy  
Hand me your stella and fly  
By the time I'm out the door  
You tear men down like Roger Moore

I cheated myself  
Like I knew I would  
I told ya, I was trouble  
You know that I'm no good

Upstairs in bed, with my ex boy,  
He's in a place, but I cant get joy,  
Thinking of you in the final throes, this is when my buzzer goes

Run out to meet you, chips and bitter  
You say when we're married cause you're not bitter  
There'll be none of him no more  
I cried for you on the kitchen floor

I cheated myself  
Like I knew I would  
I told ya, I was trouble  
You know that I'm no good

Sweet reunion, Jamaica and Spain  
We're like how we were again  
I'm in the tub, you're on the seat  
Lick your lips as I soak my feet

_Then you notice lickle carpet burn  
My stomach drops and my guts churn  
You shrug and it's the worst  
Who truly stuck the knife in first..._

_-_

"So, you have fun last night?" You sneer as you say this, lifting your drink where you scowl behind the amber colored liquid. I pause, hand posed above the bedroom door knob; I bite my lip quickly, but turn to face you with a small frown on my face.

"...what are you implying?" I ask, eyes narrowing even though I'm lying through my teeth. Why do I keep doing this? You shrug, sipping the drink you started having a taste for.

"Is there something to imply?" You ask innocently, placing the heavy glass on the kitchen counter top. I set my hand on the cool brass, and squeeze the metal_. _

"No."

"Then why are you being so paranoid?" I mentally sigh, turning my gaze away from you and turn the knob.

-

-

_I'm not dead._


	49. Talk Show Host

_I want to  
I want to be someone else or I'll explode  
Floating upon this surface for the birds  
The birds  
The birds_

__

You want me?  
Fucking well come and find me  
I'll be waiting  
With a gun and a pack of sandwiches  
And nothing  
Nothing  
Nothing  
Nothing

_You want me?  
Well come on and break the door down  
You want me?  
Fucking come on and break the door down  
I'm ready_

_-_

They laid in the bed, naked limbs intertwined and sheets clumped around their ankles. The sky outside was grey, and the air felt dirty as one of them sorted through the half smoked hash papers that lay in a burned pile beside the bed. They both were coming down; their limbs shook, and stomach cramps ran violently up their spines. "Come oonnn..." His voice was a groan, and the pathetic sound dropped down to a gurgle as he clenched his stomach.

"Shut _up_." He barked over his shoulder, finding the small white bag of heroine they always had under their bed. His hand scuttled around for a needle and plunger, hissing lightly when a broken bottle nicked his finger. He sat back up on the bed; his hands shook as he prepared the needle, heating the combination of lemon juice and heroine.

"_Pleease..._" His partner said, grabbing at his hands. He smacked the man's hands away, glaring out of the corner of his eye.

They both smiled when the mixture melted, and it was poured in; he licked his lips, slipping the needle in the nearly collapsed veins of his right arm, shuddering with he pushed the plunger. "Hey, don't use it all!" His partner smacked him on the head, causing his state of bliss to be slightly interrupted.

He nodded, slipping the needle out, wiping the bloody needle on the sheets, not caring, and handing it to the shivering fingers of the other male.

They were both whacked out of their minds, smiling to themselves as if everything was a big joke. They loved it, bringing down their intelligence so they could feel _good_ with out _thinking_. "I love you." He said, kissing the male's throat, rubbing his sides and liking the way he shivered and moaned.

Chasing the dragon, they loved it, yeah.

-

-

_I'll let you pick the characters you want to be heroine addicts! Haha The reason I wrote this one is because I finished a book called 'Smack' where the two main characters were heroine or 'smack' addicts. This song 'Talk Show Host' isn't necessarily about drugs, but the feel of it just reminds me of an opening to a drug movie. Meh, I dunno...I'm a geek. (Haha Sarah, you're gonna make fun of me for this one)._


	50. Sleepless

_As you lie before me now, like a shadow  
On a pea green sea  
Never thought that I could find you so hollow  
Laying into me_

__

But this cup of wine  
All salt and brine makes me sleepy  
A sorrow so  
A field of tears that will never yield a single penny  
But I don't know  
I've got nothing to hold on to

Wished for gold so I could buy you a palace  
By the riverside  
You'd come in and I would fill your diamond chalice  
You were still alive

But this cup of wine  
All salt and brine makes me sleepy  
A sorrow so  
A field of tears that will never yield a single penny  
But I don't know  
I've got nothing to hold on to  
I've got nothing to hold on to

Were you sleepless, tearing at the air?  
Was the water everywhere?  
Were you fretful, to wade into the room?  
I'd been wanting to hear from you  
Oh, no

Hand it over (hand it over)  
Hand it over (oh)  
You're weary, lay him down  
You did your time so thank you very much  
Hand it over (hand it over)  
Hand it over (oh)  
So now your hopes are all laid  
But you hand it all away

Did his eyelids fix on empty chairs  
You had traveled to lay beside?  
A gentle torture to watch it all recede  
And all the while your mother slept beside him  
Oh, no

Hand it over (hand it over)  
Hand it over (oh)  
You're weary, lay him down  
You did your time so thank you very much  
Hand it over (hand it over)  
Hand it over (oh)  
So now your hopes are all laid  
But you hand it all away

_Were you sleepless, tearing at the air?  
Was the water everywhere?  
Were you fearful, and long to run away  
From the cold clasp of Illinois?  
Oh, no_

_-_

L stared at the empty hospital bed, his owlish eyes wide. He couldn't feel the hot tears pooling and toppling over his dark lids, nor did he register the loud cry that tore from his throat until several nurses were trying to make him sit. His white hands shook, and he could feel the perspiration misting over his skin like dew. Where was Watari? Why wasn't he in the bed?

His mouth moved but no sound came out, and the water they tried to give him just sloshed over the rim of the paper cup and onto his pant leg. He had tried to visit last month, but multiple cases had caused him to post-pone his trip. "W-wait...!" His hand shot out, and his fingers wrapped around a nurse's thin wrist. She started with a small squeak; her brown eyes were wide as she stared down at him.

L swallowed thickly, trying to gather his scrambled thoughts. "T-the man in room 212, h-he was my gr-grandfather...where is he?" He was shaking so badly, and her somber brown-eyed gaze was doing nothing to help with the loud voice in his head that shrieked _HE'S DEAD! HE'SDEADHE'SDEADDEADDEADDEAD!_

She took a pointed glance at his fingers, and he tore his hand from her person. She cleared her throat. "I'm sorry, sir, but...your grandfather died. The cancer in his lungs spread at a faster rate than we were prepared for, and..." She bit her lip, and closed her eyes. "I'm very sorry." He didn't care when she turned away and shuffled quickly down the hall.

L crumbled on the uncomfortable hospital chair; quiet sobs racked his thin frame, and tears fell down his face. He twisted his fingers painfully through his messy raven hair, and rocked back and forth on the scratchy cushion. Guilt weighed heavily down on his bony shoulders, and he felt like the two pieces of cake he had consumed before coming were scratching up his throat. "Why didn't I come earlier!?" He said into his knees, voice eerily calm even though tears still poured down his face. "H-he...I never got to...th-thank him...." L's stomach heaved, but he swallowed down the bile.

No one looked at the strange young man as he sat in the waiting room.

-

-

_Eff, lame ending but oh well. -shrug- Anyway, I hope you liked this DEPRESSING drabble; the song is by the Decemberists (haha big suprise right?) and I cried the first time I heard it. :/ Please review._


	51. My Black Hearted Love

_I think I saw you in the shadows  
I move in closer beneath your windows  
Who would suspect me of this rapture?_

__

And who but my black hearted love?  
And who but my black hearted love?

When you call out my name in rapture  
I volunteer my soul for murder  
I wish this moment here forever

And you are my black hearted love  
And you are my black hearted love

In the rain  
In the evening  
I will come again

I'd like to take you  
I'd like to take you  
To a place I know  
My black hearted

_In the rain  
In the evening  
In the garden  
I will come _

_-_

"I mean, the poor boy must have screamed."

The yellow police tape cuts off the populace from the rather grisly crime scene, causing people to push and shove, trying to get their eye full of the macabre.

The police are taking quick photographs of the broken white body, limbs bent at awkward right angles and legs open to indicate rape. The face is badly cut up; the blood had clotted the night before, but the dark stain on the concrete is tacky under the boy's head.

Reporters are asking quick questions, firing off the sentences like verbal gunfire. The police block the scene with their bodies, grumbling that they can't tell anything yet.

The chief doesn't want to look over his shoulder, but he does anyway. He bites back bile when his eyes rest on the skinny body of the John Doe.

The boy is young, probably as young as his daughter; white curly hair sticks to the red lacerations , staining the follicles a light pink. His white button up is torn, and a pale blue back back has been thrown to one haphazard direction. Whitish blue jeans hang off of one delicate ankle, and the off white boxers have left angry red marks on the boy's pale skin. His small hands have broken and red fingernails, indicating the boy had fought back. The CSI units scrape under his fingernails for a skin sample.

The chief can't bring himself to look at the boy's face, so bloody and distorted they would have to use dental and fingerprints to identify him. The older man sighs when they put the tiny body in the black bag, selfishly thanking God that it wasn't one of his own.

-

-

_I am so mean to any of my ukes! I mean, L is the one normally getting raped and/or killed, but Near gets it a lot and so does my original character Rufus! (which that reminds me...I'm going to self-pimp....) If you guys wanna read an original story by me, you can find it here: w w w. fictionpress . com/ u / 645257 / just take out the spaces._

_Did you notice I changed my name?_

_Alrighty, about the song and possibly why it doesn't match that well with the drabble. I think of these things like little clips from movies (maybe that's why some of them don't make any sense --face palm--) The song is suppose to be what's happening BEFORE the drabble. Think of it like it's inner monologue of the killer. --shrug--_

_Anyway, please review and also PLEASE check out 'When you think you're alone'. :3_


	52. Kamikaze

_How could that happen?  
How could that happen again?  
Where the fuck was I looking  
When all his horses came in?  
And he built a whole army  
Of kamikaze_

_10,000 willing  
Pilots flying  
Interfacing  
Space and beyond  
Built an army  
To come and find me_

_Beyond all reason  
Beyond all my hopes  
The call of duty  
Another war zone  
(Makes me moan)_

_Kamikaze - you can't touch me, kamikaze_

_Eight miles high  
He walks his path  
And I follow mine  
One tooth for one eye  
He's come to find me_

_10,000 willing  
Pilots flying  
Interfacing  
Space and beyond  
Here is his army  
Interspace here we come_

_Kamikaze-you don't touch me  
Space here we come_

_-_

He rolled the name around in his mouth, running his tongue over the syllables like one would if they stuffed a pearl necklace through their lips. He played the words over and over in his brain, liking the slight ring they carried. A soft inflection on the third word, look down shyly, glance up, see the other male's reaction. Perfect ten.

He wondered how this all began, when _those_ feelings started to build. A month after meeting, two maybe? He didn't know, though he found that he _liked_ the invasion of feelings. He was ready to die, to challenge, though when he saw _him_, grainy because of the cameras placed everywhere in the house, he felt something shoot down his spine. _His_ dark intellect caused more and more confusion to swell in his over-stuffed brain; the glances, the slight touching of fingers against sensitive wrists.

He gulped and turned his dark eyes toward the male sitting beside him. He counted his breaths, watching the gental rise and fall of his chest. He blinked and bit his tongue. "Raito-kun...?" He was unsure of himself (for once, and it was a strange feeling). The male gave him his attention (the attention that most _pined_ for, but never receved), and he felt his head swimming.

"Yes?" Smooth voice, edges worn out of practice.

He paused, preparing to take the plung, nose first. A swan-dive. "My...my name is L Lawliet." He knew he took the bite of the forbidden fruit, killed his brother Able in a jealous rage. Cast out of paradise and shoved to the land of Nod.

The other male blinked slowly, trying in vain to cover his glee. "I see."

-

-

_Seriously, I don't know. _

_Please review!_


	53. Who Knew?

_You took my hand  
You showed me how  
You promised me you'd be around  
Uh huh  
That's right  
I took your words  
And I believed  
In everything  
You said to me  
Yeah huh  
That's right_

__

If someone said three years from now  
You'd be long gone  
I'd stand up and punch them out  
Cause they're all wrong  
I know better  
Cause you said forever  
And ever  
Who knew

Remember when we were such fools  
And so convinced and just too cool  
Oh no  
No no  
I wish I could touch you again  
I wish I could still call you friend  
I'd give anything

When someone said count your blessings now  
'fore they're long gone  
I guess I just didn't know how  
I was all wrong  
They knew better  
Still you said forever  
And ever  
Who knew

Yeah yeah  
I'll keep you locked in my head  
Until we meet again  
Until we  
Until we meet again  
And I won't forget you my friend  
What happened

_If someone said three years from now  
You'd be long gone  
I'd stand up and punch them out  
Cause they're all wrong and  
That last kiss  
I'll cherish  
Until we meet again  
And time makes  
It harder  
I wish I could remember  
But I keep  
Your memory  
You visit me in my sleep  
My darling  
Who knew_

_-_

He stared around the apartment, his hand still on the door knob. His face was expressionless as his eyes swept over the mess on the floor; from the scattered about clothing to the missing pieces of furniture. People in the hallway were starting to stop and stare so he walked into the apartment and clicked the door shut behind himself.

He was calm as he slipped out of his shoes, setting his bare feet onto the fuzzy carpet and into the kitchen where he poured himself a cup of coffee. He sipped the cold, over-sugared brew one, two times before he hurled the cup; the ceramic crashed into the wall, staining the white with a splash of light brown.

The male choked back an enraged scream; he felt his face crumble as tears broke through his emotionless mask. He slid down to the floor, grabbing at his hair and biting his lip until he tasted blood. The male gulped down some air, and stood up, grabbing a kitchen towel and broom; he worked quietly, not letting his eyes stray over to the door way, wondering if it would open, or if he would just wake up and find that this was all a dream.

Sadly, that never happened.

-

-

_Uh, yeah...Pink's song 'Who Knew?'...totally. Review please :D_


	54. Perfect Crime 1

_Two, three, four!_

_I got a gun, I got a girl  
I got a bullet-proof plan to pull  
The perfect crime  
I got the perfect crime_

_I got a warehouse down at the docks  
I got fifteen precincts of cops bought  
The perfect crime  
I got the perfect crime_

_You got to get your clock locked  
Get your stopwatch synchronized  
You got to get it so you can't put a pin through your alibi  
To pull the perfect crime  
To pull the perfect crime_

_Bu-bu-bu bah_

_I got a guy bought on the inside  
I got a night guard gagged and hog-tied  
The perfect crime  
This is the perfect crime_

_I got a brain, I got the brawn  
I got all the proper papers for the gendarme  
The perfect crime  
C'est ca the perfect crime_

_I got the mob boss bought  
I got a letter from the DEA  
I got a mockup of the lockup  
Where they stock up all their fucking change  
To pull this perfect crime  
This is the perfect crime_

_Bu-bu-bu bah_

_We hit a snag when we tripped the alarm  
Because the dock side specs have been tipped off in time  
To this perfect crime_

_Call out the dogs, call out the cops  
We caught the deputy officer  
Cold-cock or we'll do time  
For this perfect crime_

_So we ran around town with the cops stepping on our tails  
Because we'd rather break depth then a French fuck in county jail  
Just for the perfect crime  
For the perfect crime  
This is the perfect crime_

_-_

He tapped his shiny gun against the heel of his boot; the way he leaned against the gritty side of the building made the brick rub uncomfortably in his back. He tapped out a rythm of some song that he heard on the raido, waiting for his counterpart. His eyes stopped on a male walking at a leisurly pace, decked out in outragous clothing. "There you are." He said, pushing off the wall to meet the other male. His friend smiled easily, putting a cigarette up to his lips and lighting it with practiced speed.

"Have you been scaring the little old ladies?" He snorted, watching when his friend pulled out a gun from his vest pocket and cocking it.

They turned toward the building, pulling masks over their faces and nodding at eachother.

-

-

_This is a Decemberists song called 'The Perfect Crime number one'. It reminded me of Mello and Matt. Haha. Also, how you people mind if I did a Jack the Ripper LightxL fic? Please review and tell me what you think of this and also of the fic mentioned. :D_


	55. The Culling of the Fold

_Cut him up boy  
You've got to cut him up boy  
He's a wicked disgrace  
And he said it to your face  
You better cut him up boy_

__

Take him by the teeth  
Get him down on his knees  
With your hands all shaking  
That'll teach him how to take it

Gotta cut him up boy  
And how

Ply her heart with gold and silver  
And take your sweetheart down to the river

Dash her on the paving stones  
It may break your heart  
To break her bones  
But someones got to do, the culling of the fold

cut him up girl  
Really cut him up girl  
He lives by himself in a hole in a wall,  
You've gotta cut him up girl

You can take him in a stitch  
Dump his body in a ditch  
Leave his limbs all naked  
That'll teach him how to take it

Better cut him up girl  
And how

Ply her heart with gold and silver  
And take your sweetheart down to the river

Dash her on the paving stones  
It may break your heart  
To break her bones  
But someones got to do, the culling of the fold

Listen up boy  
And listen up girl  
It's a shallow little trench  
And it's giving off a stench

It's a shallow little world

Feeling down in the face  
Could you use a little space  
When the radio crackles  
And the inlaws cackle

You better cut him up boy  
And cut him up girl

Ply her heart with gold and silver  
And take your sweetheart down to the river

_Dash her on the paving stones  
It may break your heart  
To break her bones  
But someones got to do, the culling of the fold_

_-_

His scarlet eyes glared down at the figure kneeling in front of him, head bent in concentration and wry hands curled around his dick. His own fingers were woven tightly through the figure's raven hair, pushing his head down further, making the male take more of him in. He heard the male gag lightly, and he saw his eyes widen. The thin hands uncurled from his dick and were set flat against the sidewalk; the boy tried to push away from him, but he pushed down more and more, causing the sound of choking to fill his ears.

As he looked at the boy, the prostitute began to seem less and less like his beloved Lawli. His eyes weren't light grey, they were a sluggish black with tears running down his too sunken cheeks. There were faded pock marks on his forehead, and his dyed raven hair was greasy, not feathery.

The prostitute began to slow down his attempts at escape; Beyond could see his eyes beginning to fade, and soon his movements stopped all together.

Beyond removed the male from his person with a disgusted sneer. He stood and zipped up his baggy pants, studying the gasping youth with curious, dancing red eyes. He reached into his pocket, taking out a rusted, blood-stained pocket knife; he unfolded the sharp instrument with care and leaned over the boy. A deep scowl covered his lips as he brought the knife closer to the prostitute's jugular...

-

-

_Couldn't sleep, so I wrote this. Please review. _


	56. Live to Tell the Tale

_A single grain can tip the scale  
Amidst the burden the scale will prevail  
Showing what's worth being here  
Storyteller by a hearth of stone  
A white little creature purring me  
My childhood kingdom gone in time  
The islands filling my mind with blue  
The one in special, heaven's court_

_All the joy unforgiven by this task_

_An errant soul, homeless and foul  
All gone but the will to  
Live to tell the tale_

_The days are filled with anxiety  
Frustration, one right note a day  
Where to find a perfect tune  
Just do the work and take a step back_

_All the joy unforgiven by this task_

_An errant soul, homeless and foul  
All gone but the will to  
Live to tell the tale_

_Dark chambers of my mind  
Locked around the neck of my love  
None of you understand  
And it doesn't matter  
To a broken marionette like me (me)_

_An errant soul, homeless and foul  
An errant soul, homeless and foul  
All gone but the will to  
Live to tell the, to tell the tale_

_-_

The top two buttons were put through the wrong loops, causing an annoying bump to appear on his tie. There was a slight mist on his top lip, and sweat beaded on the edge of his hair line; he swallowed, fiddling with the papers in his hand as he stared down at the inmate, eyes blank as a slate. He shifted from one foot to the other, gulping down some spit that rested heavily in his mouth. "Good morning." He said, false cheer coating his voice like candy.

Those eyes didn't waver in the slightest. The cop cleared his throat and sat down to be level with the other occupant. Why they gave him the job of interrogating a child was beyond him. "My name is Touta Matsuda and I-I'm gonna ask you a few questions before the psychologist comes in to evaluate you, um, okay?"

The silence was heavy, pressing down upon Matsuda like water. The heat was becoming horrid, sucking every inch of his skin and still, those eyes wouldn't _move_.

"Mr. Matsuda-san," The voice came from the boy's mouth; it was hollow, monotone. "Is this the first time you ever had to kneel to be eye level with a killer?" A small amused smile came to the boy's mouth. His eyes remained dead.

Matsuda felt his hands beginning to shake, but he dug his nails into his palms to stop. This was only a kid; there wasn't any reason to get so worked up about a simple question.

He forced a smile, feeling its fakeness as his lips twitched . "Yes actually..." The boy made a small noise in his throat; it was almost...triumphant in a way, or maybe Matsuda was reading too much into it. He glanced down at the papers, dark brown eyes zoomed across the page before he lifted them to the boy. "Your...foster parents; they were found with multiple stab wounds and a single shot to the head. Point blank range, executioner style." Matsuda took a deep breath and continued. "Um, the youngest child, this one their natural child, was found in the attic. She was strangled and also stabbed. Her lips were cut from the corner to the ear."

The boy sat back in his chair; one of his hand (both wrists were bound together by handcuffs) came up, and a finger curled around a snowy strand. He closed his eyes, and breathed in deeply before he let out a dream-like sigh. "Karen and Robert...they loved to show off the prize they had plucked from an orphanage. At dinner parties, they would call me in; 'Nate,' they would say (even though I constantly reminded them my name is _Near_), 'Show the nice people how smart you are!'"

"I danced, like a peddler's monkey. Jumping through any hoop, never once defying them in fear of I would be tossed out." The boy, Near, tugged harshly at his hair. The tape recorder on the table clicked once, and he continued.

"They had two older foster children before me; bother were smart, already in college by the time they were fifteen. They didn't come see mummy and daddy dearest often." He gave a small humorless laugh. "But, they had one daughter, about a year younger than me. Her name was Rebecca, and she was...always...smiling..."

Matsuda mentally flinched at the boy's expression. It was a mixture between dully blank and dream-like fondness. "What-What caused you to...snap?" He asked softly.

The boy was quiet for a moment, staring blindly across the room. "Wouldn't you...if every time someone said 'Jump' you would have to ask, 'How high'? I wasn't anything to be loved; it was my brain that they loved, not me. While I festered away, surrounded by only my toys, _she_ would be showered with adoration."

Matsuda blinked, the sound of the tape recorder clicking being the only sound in the room. "So you were jealous?"

Near smirked, untwisting his fingers from his hair. "No, not at all. I was _bored_, and having the _excuse_ of jealousy...well, it'll be an interesting trial."

-

-

_I wrote this yesterday during class. I hope you like crazy!Near. I've had this idea stored in my brain for awhile, but anyway; Please Review!_

_The song is by Nightwish, Sarah suggested it. :D  
_


	57. First Orgasm

_It is a thursday  
I get up early  
it is a challenge  
I'm usually lazy_

__

I make some coffee  
I eat some rice chex  
and then I sit down  
to check my inbox

I only read a word or two  
I stare across the street and see the churches and the blue

The first orgasm of the morning  
is cold and hard as hell  
there won't be any second coming  
as far as I can tell

I arch my back cause  
I'm very close now  
it's very cold here  
by the window

There are some school kids  
yelling and running  
I barely notice  
that I am cumming

The first orgasm of the morning  
is like a fire drill  
it's nice to have a little warning  
but not enjoyable

I am too busy to have friends  
a lover would just complicate my plans  
so I will never look for love again  
I'm taking matters into my own hands

_I think I could last at least a week without someone to hold me  
Won't you hold me? _

_-_

L always thought the dynamics of kissing were disgusting. Taking the area most infested by germs and pressing it against another person's, not to mention that you had no _clue _where that person had put their mouth, was just _nasty_.

He watched, through the grainy monitors, as Light seduced yet another _tart_; he watched their kissing with a disgusted curl to his lip, glad that the elder Yagami was somewhere in the other room.

Kissing was disgusting; this was coming from constant observation, not from the practice itself. Sticking your tongue into someone's else's mouth and vise versa, sharing spit, and swallowing the liquid.

L watched as they moved on from furious necking to clothing being removed; he gulped, his hand wandering to places it _shouldn't_.

The dynamics of sex were even more disgusting than kissing. Something being sheathed into someone's orifice, sweating all over your partner, and sharing sticky bodily fluids.

Through narrowed eyes, he paid no particular attention to the girl being pounded into, but at the severely _bored_ expression Light wore. His hand pumped his own arousal, curling his toes on the chair he was sitting on. He let his fingers scramble under his top, tweaking a hardened nipple. He bit on his lip to keep the moans at bay, and L forced himself to come when Light did.

He huffed, closing his eyes as he wiped off his hand on a tissue.

Kissing and sex were both disgusting, but masturbation was the worst.

-

-

_I really don't know where this came from (haha). Like, I was thinking about how GROSS the human body is, and how NASTY it was when people do the actions for reproducing, but I know that it's also an emotional connection, yada yada..._

_Anyway, you get L wanking off...I haven't been feeling good enough to update on anything other than useless drabbles. But I hoped you liked this nonetheless! The song is 'First Orgasm' by the Dresden Dolls. _


	58. Lonesome Organist Rapes a Page Turner

_  
He told me that I knew just what to laugh at  
And I wanted to but I just couldn't ask if he would take it back so I could know for certain  
So on the bench I watched his left hand crossing  
While doubling entendres with the voicings  
He said "O darling, you're charming  
Please don't find it alarming if I pull this stop out to free up a hand for heavy petting"_

__

Now there there  
I'm a friendly man  
I joke about sex because it's funny when you're frightened

So silently I sat and turned the pages  
Recalculating our respective ages  
Over my shoulder, he muttered, "If I get any older  
You can hack my wrists off with your choice of objects  
No, I'm kidding"

Don't be scared  
I'm a friendly man  
I joke about death because it's funny when you're frightened

This is as far as I could get  
He jabbed a needle in my neck  
Erasing all the evidence  
But there were matchsticks in my pants  
And if a rock should hit my head  
And I remember what he did  
You'll be the very first to know  
Maybe I'll find out why this damn thing won't stop bleeding

He told me that I showed a great potential  
That given I turned heads and pages  
Fame would be a piece of cake  
But practice was essential  
So like a stupid child I believed it  
And golly who would ever had agreed if  
I had been Schubert or Mozart  
Devoted to the fine art of perfecting absolutely everything inconsequential

Don't be sad  
I'll come back again  
I joke about trash 'cause it takes class to be enlightened

_So several decades have gone by  
I am still sitting by his side  
I turn the pages faithfully  
He turns his head and smiles at me  
And with a wink he says, "I doubt  
We would be anywhere without  
Your gift for keeping truth and consequence from meeting." _

_-_

Near couldn't remember where he was going as he ran through the twisted alleyways of...where was he again?

His sock covered feet were soaking with blood, rain and other things he would have rather not thought about. He didn't see where he was going because of his swimming gaze; his eyes began to lull in his head and soon he fell to the ground with a wet plop.

Hours (or maybe minutes? Who knew...) later, the white haired boy awoke to find his body nestled in a warm bed. He felt covers rubbing over bare legs, and Near wondered where his pants had gone.

He sat up on the comfortable bed, curling his legs under his body; one finger played with the end of a frayed sleeve and his eyes stared straight across the room, boring a hole into the wooden door. He could hear someone moving beyond that door, and he watched as the door knob turned.

A man pushed in the door; he was an aesthetically pleasing man; his hair was a nice auburn with honey highlights, swept neatly on his head. His eyes were slanted slightly, hinting at Asian decent, though they weren't the dark-dark brown that one normally stereotypes with the Asian race; they were a warm gold colour with a powdered rouge. Though that was only Near's first impression of him.

The male held a tray of food in one hand, and a steaming mug of _something_ in his other hand. He smiled at Near, one corner going up pleasantly, highlighting his eyes even more. "I'm glad to see that you're awake." His voice was smooth, like sweet chocolate syrup that...someone Near knew loved. The man placed the tray of food on the bed beside the white haired boy, and he handed him the warm mug. Near sniffed the mug's contents, deciding that he liked the slightly bitter-sweet smell, and took a long gulp.

Near lifted his dark eyes up to meet the man's gaze. "Um," His voice was haggard and it cracked slightly. He cleared his throat and tried again. "W-where am I?" He took in his surroundings with a quick sweeping gaze; the room was nicely furnished, very put together just like the individual standing before him. Dark wine coloured drapes drawn over what looked like a large bay window. The walls were an off white creme colour with dark brown wooden floors.

The man flashed him another disarming smile, watching him as he slurped down the rest of the tea (was it tea?). "I found you passed out, and I didn't want anything bad to happen to you, so I took you here. To my home."

Near made a move to get off the bed, but the male pushed him down into his uncomfortable sitting position. "You need to eat." Near glanced at the food; he gulped and nodded, not liking this man's hands resting heavily on his shallow shoulders.

He picked up the elegant looking fork beside the plate full of food; he placed a forkful into his mouth, eyes going wide at the wonderful explosions bursting on his tongue. Soon, all the food was shoveled into his hungry mouth; Ne could have sworn that the man's smile was stretching, even slightly.

Near's vision began to get blurry, and he felt a misty sweat begin to over take his small body. "What's...ha-happing....???" He began to sway and soon he found himself plopping down onto the soft pillows.

The man's smile was soon stretching around his head, almost like a zipper with pointed teeth. "You're going to be fine." His voice sounded like it was coming through a tube, and it was doubled over like...someone's had been whenever he had talked to him....

Near felt like he was going to become sick and soon he fell into oblivion.

-

-

_Another update with another Dresden Dolls song. :D Light's crazy. Please review!_


	59. After the Bombs

_and after the bombs subside  
and this campaign  
calls it good for the night_

we meet in the streets  
will we meet in a bar's cold light?  
we grip at our hands  
we hold just a little tight

after the bombs  
after the bombs  
subside

and after the rockets calm  
and the glimmer of fire  
pretends an early dawn

we pinch at our skin  
while we wonder how we  
escaped harm

we forget all our trials  
while there  
in our baby's arms

after the rockets  
after the rockets  
calm

then we'll go dancing  
won't we go dancing  
yes we'll go dancing

'till it all  
starts over again

then we'll go dancing  
yes we go dancing  
won't we'll go dancing

'till it all  
starts over again

_-_

"I love it." She stares at the engagement ring glinting on her skinny finger. He smiles and plays with one of her raven strands.

"I'm glad." His voice is low and he pulls her into a loose embrace; he circles his thin arms around her waist and rests his large hands over the swollen skin of her abdomen.

She relaxes into his loose hug, placing the back of her skull on his shallow chest. They stand like that for a few minutes, watching the Paris skyline; their breathing is in sync with the blinking lights. "...we're never going to be safe." She feels him gulp and nod. "They're going to track you down and take you away from me," She pauses and places her hands over his. "And the baby."

He moves away from her, and she misses his warmth. "I know...but for the borrowed time I have..." She turns to him, not liking the sound his Russian accented voice carries. His dark grey eyes glisten with unshed tears. "I love you."

And they stand together in the darkened room, faces washed out by red and white lights.

-

The baby is born a month later, and they move to West Germany. The baby isn't officially given a name, only a letter. It was her idea. "He's going to be great one day." She strokes the edge of the baby's soft, pale skin. His own wide grey eyes watch his beautiful mother's face as he sucks a thumb.

He steps into the living room, carrying two cups of tea. She watches him take a long sip from his with a grimace covering her face. "I don't know why you drink it like that." A small smile plays at his mouth.

"Helps me think." And he taps at his temple with a finger.

-

It is three years later, back in England, when they are finally discovered. She had dropped the baby--toddler now--off at her neighbor's house. The woman is old, and her home smelled lightly of cat urine.

They're in the car when they hear the click. He rests his large hand over her's and squeezes. Then the explosion.

-

-

_Well, angst for your new year. Inspired GREATLY by another fic centering around L's parents. L's dad is half Japanese, half Russian. He was raised by his father in Russia and became a member of the KGB. L's mother is a quarter French, a quarter English and a quarter Italian. She was raised by both her parents in England and became a member of the M-5. _

_After the Bombs--look it up on grooveshark or google. It's very good. _


	60. Do You Want To?

_When I woke up tonight  
I said I'm gonna make somebody love me  
I'm Gonna make somebody love me  
And now I know, now I know, now I know  
I know that it's you  
You're Lucky, lucky, you're so lucky_

_Well do ya, do ya, do ya wanna  
Well do ya, do ya, do ya wanna  
Wanna go where I never let you before_

_Well do ya, do ya, do ya wanna  
Well do ya, do ya, do ya wanna  
Wanna go of what I never let you before_

_Well he's a friend and he's so proud of ya  
He's a friend and I knew him before ya  
Oh yeah_

_Well he's a friend and we're so proud of ya  
Your famous friend well I blew him before ya  
Oh yeah_

_Well do ya, do ya, do ya wanna  
Well do ya, do ya, do ya wanna  
Wanna go where I never let you before_

_Here we are at the transmission party  
I love your friends  
They're all so arty  
Oh yeah_

_When I woke up tonight  
I said I'm gonna make somebody love me  
I'm Gonna make somebody love me  
And now I know, now I know, now I know  
I know that it's you  
You're Lucky, lucky, you're so lucky_

_Well do ya, do ya, do ya wanna  
Well do ya, do ya, do ya wanna  
Want a go, of what I never let you before_

_Lucky, lucky, you're so lucky  
Lucky, lucky, you're so lucky  
Lucky, lucky, you're so lucky  
Lucky, lucky, you're so lucky  
Lucky, lucky, you're so lucky  
Lucky, lucky, you're so lucky_

_Yeahhh!_

_-_

"They're all so clever and pretty." His mouth closed over the cigarette, sucking in the tangy smoke for a moment before release. His long fingers stubbed the cigarette into an over filled ashtray, knocking over some bent fillers in the process. He studied more people as they came up to the scratched bar; they regarded him with the merest flicker of the eyes, not really meeting his own which glowed slightly crimson in the dim light.

The young man took a sip of his drink, his eyes never once leaving the large group of bar goers as they walked in and out. They stopped on one name in particular, the life span...he smirked and stood from his comfortable position on the bar stool. He walked through the people like a ghost, weaving around the closely knit bodies, to the object of his interest.

The woman sipped slowly at her drink; her hands were old looking, and her finger nails were chewed down to the quick. Her loosely curled hair, thrown up in a hastily made bun, was beginning to grey in streaks. He tapped her on her stooped shoulder; she jumped slightly, turning toward him like a frightened animal. "Excuse me..." He said lowly, smiling at her charismatically. Her eyebrows creased, and she looked around for someone else he might be talking to. He chuckled and asked if he could sit down. They began talking; she had been quiet at first, but as she grew more relaxed (and the alcohol helped), she began to get more outgoing.

Later, he was helping her get into her apartment; she kept leaning up against him, touching him on the face and arms. "I...feel...funny..." And she began to sway on her feet.

When she fell to a heap, he smirked lightly. He dragged her into her living room, sprawling her on the floor. He walked into the small kitchen, and opened a drawer to find a hammer. Returning to the living room he began to hum a small tune. She didn't stir when he began to beat her left arm. He watched as the skin begin to bruise and purple where he repeatedly smashed the hammer into it. He glanced at her lifespan, growling softly when the numbers only went down one by one. "This isn't working..." He huffed.

He pulled out a knife from the pocket of his jeans. The steel was lightly stained a brown-orange colour; he placed the knife against the purpled skin of her left arm and began to cut. His eyes lowered to half mass, and a small serene smile spread across his lips. The arm came off with a sucking _crunch_, and he began work on her right leg.

Blood leaked out on the dingy carpet as he worked the skin. Grabbing the hammer, he crushed the femur with two heavy blows.

They young man hoisted the heavy leg over his shoulder and walked into the bathroom. Without turning on the light, he dumped the leg into the bathtub and turned away.

He walked back into the living room. Spying a wall opposite of the woman, he took the hammer and two straw wara ningyo. After the task was completed, he began the tedious process of wiping down _everything_.

Opening the window after locking the door, he smiled at the dead woman. "Good night Believe Bridesmaid...I had a lovely time."

-

-

_MMM'yeah...Beyond..._

_Please review!_


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